Leave Me Alone!

2008-03-17T21:03:00.002+08:00

Cant believe tat my actual bd was celebrated like tis.. went for movies after work.. den drop by billybombers to see tiansong.. .. after tat went clubbing.. @ MOS.. had a great time there... with e dance n drinks.. and ppl who i dono keep coming to tok to mi.. well tis is hw i actually celebrated my bd.. nev in my life i tht of that.. haha

den e next day. 15/3/08.. in the morn went out to the zoo... had a great time wit ah han, kelivn, and andy... took some pics.. bt a bit disappointed cos nt many animals are awake or more to see.. bt quite like e elephant show.. was funny n nice. thereafter, alex came to pick mi up @ amk and send home to change for my date... den send mi to orchard.. haha sooo sweet of him..

den met up wit kevin for movie.. STEP UP 2.. it was very nice and woooooooo e dance is power sia.. we even took a video of it. den after tat we stroll down to boders for BK.. after which he left to meet his frens.. n i went Luna to find nichols.. i cant believe it his mom n his mom frens keep wanting to see mi... i so pai seh.. bt went down.. had drinks n dance.. den after tat went home..

2008-03-10T04:04:00.000+08:00

i dono when i startd to like someone... bt it seems tat he start to care for mi.. and say tat even no one be there for me.. he will.. haha.. i dono whether i stil can believe any guys anymore.. or even anyone... i really give up hope.. give up fate.. give up life... really lost of words or ways to cont wit life...

i learn to accept fate is not in ur hands... it is plan already and ppl need to go thru in a diff ways to live in tis world... we can only either avoid or work for it... n theres no 2nd chance to turn back... wats done is done... e only way is either not to repeat or improve.. haiz.. bt i am stuck somewhere... i try my best bt den i fail .... i reallly lousy... keke..

after all tis things have been happening... i come up wit my plans or wat move i wan to make..... i will be ant Juliet... n no longer e one which my frens will noe... since i live so miserable.. den i shld change to live happily... bt i will hurt others terribly.... once i decided to make tis move.. i cant turn back.. so shld i??? or shld i not???

2008-03-09T20:03:00.001+08:00

Over e week had my bd celebration at the chalet... hmm although i am happy that it was alrite bt was disappointed tat most of my gd buddies are able to come due to some reasons bah.. well... at least i noe who cares and who dons...

on fri, went dbl o with jefferene, fida, diyana, andy, kelvi & alex... had drinks and dance.. thereafter, went for supper @ river vally den head back to chalet ard 5plus am for zzZzz.. keke.. den the next day was e bbq... was raining in e noon and scare it turn out bad.. bt lucky it was nt raining after tat.. had the gathering wit my frens and so... and nite e whole bunch came down after work.. keke.. had some fun there... and slept the whole day on sun.. was super tired...

2008-03-09T03:00:00.000+08:00

tis past days haven been working non stop... mayb i jus don wan to anyhw think and also to make myself earn more $$$.. really tired as e.day work 19hrs... 2 hrs travel.. 1hr bath.. e rest is for zzzz... my body finally cannot take it.. n gt in contact wit virus.. n have high fever.. vomit.. cold. cough... all in one come 2gather... bt stil have to work lah... tats life... haiz... nth much to update...

2008-03-03T02:54:00.000+08:00

celebrated my bd last week end.. hmmm was really in e mood for e celebration cos alot of things have happen... and i jus wan to thank for those who came and help me to prepare e.ting... and for those who promise to come and didnt come last min... i also wan to thank them... from tis pt i noe who really are my frens....

although it wasnt really tat fun which i hope to expect.. bt i stil enjoy those company and e presents i collected... all of it was great n nice.. esp my mei mei n yi long present... it was really beautiful and i will keep it properly..

2008-02-28T13:09:00.003+08:00

i finally feel that when i am feeling down.. tats no one i can turn up to... mayb tats my fate n life bah... slowly i learn to accept that i shld cont to live in my own world and be left alone... i do not need any frens... any lover.. any help.. i feel like going back to my old footsteps.. mayb tat way i will be much happier and better... haiz... bt i will always be there for my frens when they need me...cos my heart for them is always pure. :)

my mood isnt stable any and i keep thinking abt e prob that i created... although nichlos and marcus ask mi to relax and stop thinking as the things have been done and i cant do anything. jus hope e.thing goes smoothly. wait till e result is out den decide... haha i cant believe they are e ones to be there for mi.... n i noe marcus will always do that.. he have been a listening ear for nearly 10yrs.. thanks dear.. i really touch...

my work was soo affected by my mood that i left work early yest to go home n rest... i jus feel like being alone... and i even give up working tdy cos i really low moral.. and wanted to find someone to tok.. bt den e.one seems to be busy here n there... suddenly i realise somethings.. friends are really company for fun and laughter.. when u really need them... no one is to be reach.. suai le... the title i already own -"Leave Me aLone" .. ..... .....

2008-02-27T03:57:00.001+08:00

Exam are jus over.. haiz.. i am very disappointed wit myself. feeling like slapping n kicking myself.. i didnt do well for e last paper.. i read the question wrongly and wrote other things... y??? y??? wat happen to mi??? i burst into tears when i came out of e classroom... dono y cant hold back my tears.. i cant beleive e 1st person i call was nichlos to throw out my sorrow... he also gt a shock of his life...after some chat.. i cool down.. but den things didnt work well for long...

i didnt went out wit my classmates cos i was feeling super down.. don have the mood.. so i went home.. cope myself in my room the whole nite... n nw i cant sleep.. although is stil 3hrs to go b4 i go to work.. bt my mood is stil very upset...i dono y i screw up e paper.. is e last paper n is nt easy to score and i destory it... been crying e whole nite... haiz... zzzzzzzzz

2008-02-15T00:56:00.002+08:00

tdy gt back e course work for most of e subj... hmmm was very satisfy wit some and disappointed in some too... bt overall was quite with some grades as my effort wont not paid off.. haha... den went home to rest...

well didnt really went out bt meet near my place... i cant believe my Vday was spent wit e young boy.. haha.. well.. he was soo cute and nice... he bake cookies and make a special drink for mi... tis is e hardship of his present he gave mi... haha... 1st time a guy cook something for mi.. lol... although he wasnt my bf... bt den he is gd catch.. haha.. u noe wat i mean??? hmmm den went home to rest.. wasnt feeling well e past few days..keke..

haiz... @ home resting suddenly i tht over alot of things... how come is nt him bt other ppl celebrating wit mi... did he went back to japan??? at least a sms or a email rite??? bt nth at all.. i stil rem last yr... he bought a ring n propose to mi... bt i sort of reject... due to some reasons.. bt nw nth is done.... am i going to wait??? is his promise being kept??? no idea... no ans... haiz... klah.. tired liao.. will update again...

2008-02-13T00:11:00.008+08:00

yest went to daddy house.... had KFC for meals and enjoys e cocktails that he made for us... was enojoying his cocktail... and e fun with e rest... haha.. daddy also play facebook sia... and i keep perstering him to buy mi..lol.... went off quite early yo boon house for steamboat....

over @ boon house... as usual.. steamboat for dinner...and all e silly & funny lame jokes and chat... is been a long time we had a gathering... after which is majong session and e rest pokers.. as usual.. ahah.. with all e games n chat... till 12am haha.. den after is e most impt parts.. e photo session... we always come up wit lame ideas and taking pis nt stop.. haha

2008-02-05T00:00:00.000+08:00

Yest, i dono y gt tis werid feeling asking mi to call him.... i dono whether he will be back fr japan bt jus feel he will... so i pick up e phone and call him... GUESS WHAT?? my feelings were rite... he is back in sg.. bt den no calls fr him.... so i tht of waiting a few more days to see he will contact mi??? Ans: NO.....

Sometimes i wonder whatever he say to mi isit true ant???? i really doubt guys words... haha... he say he promise to marry mi 2yrs time when he come back bt jus tis short trip.. he didnt even contact mi... gt a bad feeling something must have happen.... but watever itis... didnt affect mi much too... watever come to hand i just take it lor...keke....

2008-02-02T03:56:00.000+08:00

@ last Projs and Reports are over... have been staying up sooo late.... and doing research like siao... @ last can take a gd rest... and enjoy my CNY which is next week.... bt den not looking forward @ all.. cos nth much to be happy abt.. e.year also e same... haha.... to be cont........

2008-01-14T23:51:00.000+08:00

haiz.. is 2008.. ant brand new year... 2007 hasnt been a gd one for mi... have been struggling alot of things... ups and downs... hopefully 2008 is a better one bah...

starting of e yr was a busy month for mi... rushing for reports and projs... didnt sleep well... stuggling all e way... but manage to balance my life with all e hard work ongoing... keke...

2008.. i hope to live a better life.. get thru my studies... and get a good job... at e same time stay healthy and happy... keke..

2007-10-12T03:09:00.000+08:00

recently, times havnt been good somehow.. did receive his emails and calls.. bt i simply nev respond cos was busy and tired when i come home... havnt been sleeping well... keke.. e other day i went to his hm and wrote alot of things.. during tis period wat i really wan??? i wonder do i like him or being wit him to let go e past??? simple confuse and blur... i need time to re-consider again..

lately being meeting up wit mich, sally, mike and jeremy... it seems we been meeting for dinner and chill out... keke.. and best part is yest we went ZOUK... it was quite fun and happening... havnt been there since ir re-opened.. haha surprising we i saw ivan, guo hao and wai leong... all my long time frens.. did enjoy myself bt had to left early as i have to work early in e morn tdy.. sian rite... haha.. ciazo.. time to sleep liao... up-date ant day...

2007-10-01T02:45:00.000+08:00

It has been a long time since i blog... hmmm ever since attachment started i had been busy wit it and meeting up wit frens.. well beinnging didnt really like there bt after sometime ok lor... quite disappointed.. wonder did i make e rite choice...wat to do jus have to bear wit it till nov.. haiz..

on the other hand.. a frenship which i treasure had came to an end... everything ended jus like a dream.. she stil gt e cheek to say we betrayed her when she did it 1st to us.. she had used us and tis is call frens.. haha.. i shall see hw long such ppl can live onz... will she chose to be e one she love??? or will she stay wit her $$ box... i believe she wont get watever she want in e end.. since she loves to lie to e.one and started all e stupid lying.. f disappointed wit her..

one after ant.. 1st is her.. 2nd is him... e person who i work so hard for.. bt behind mi.. say nasty things.. i always believe.. such ppl will have their own bao ying... haha..

2007-09-02T20:14:00.000+08:00

yest after work. went to find my da lao po... its been a long time i last saw her... stay @ her place chatting wit her and playing wit her 2 kids.. raven is so big already and very notti.. bt he's dame cute.. haiz... 4get to take pics.. den chat wit kor over msn also.. his son also very big and super notti sia. haha.. den chatted til 6plus den we went for dinner and shop @ tiong bahru plaza.. met up wit her two sis and ting li.. her sis child.. after dinner company them to shop and they bought clothes.. den after tat i went off..

i went walk walk alone... couldnt find anyone to company.. all my frens seems to be very busy.. either wit works, familys, or bf/gf... haiz.. so im left alone lor.. dono y jus felt so lonely for a moment.. as like when im down.. i couldnt find anyone to confront.. bt i am always there for my frens.. mayb its my fate bah...

i walk to fishing pond and sat there seeing ppl catching fish... and tht alot of things.. yest i ended e r.s wit boy.. although he don wan to let go.. bt i insisted.. i really do like him alot and willing to walk wit him down e road.. bt things always do happen.. i am really super tired of tis life liao... cant i jus have a proper r.s.. y must there always be a 3rd party come in bet... is my fate remainng singel will be beta??? tis time rd, i give up e,ting i built... i don wan him to suffer wit mi.. i rather suffer alone and be hurt alone.. although he die die don wan let go.. i jus ignore him...

To: you, ( words tat kept deep in my heart)
i'm really sorry.. i love u too much bt i need to let go as i don wish to hurt u and be hurt further.. i rahter end nw and bear all e pain rather than cont to suffer and left alone. i will still keep my promise to u.. bt u must be strong and make ur own decision.. don belive ppl easily or else u be cheat... as i no longer by ur side.. u must take care of ur health, rem to take ur meals.. sleep well.. and take ur med on time.. u must depend on urself and work towards ur goals.. thanks for e.ting u done for mi.. e times and moments u spend wit mi... u are e 3rd best guy i ever known.. bt too bad i cant be e one to walk down e road wit u anymore.. tats someone beta and u will slowly let go mi and accept a new one.. muakcs love u...

2007-08-31T03:02:00.000+08:00

Tis few days alot of misunderstanding and argument wit boy... was nt really happy abt it and wanting to give up... i felt very tired to drag on and wasting his time... tat day we had a gd tok and said e.ting out... i wanted to hold back my tears bt it keep rolling down my cheek.. mayb becos i really like him and felt e pain in e way he treat mi... it seems e.ting little thing i did, he don even rem or put it into his heart.. he felt is common and like tat lor.. bt of cos to mi e.ting little things counts... so we say out wat we really wan and hw to improve tis r.s... e only sentence made mi re-consider is:

"if i'm nt serious in tis r.s, do u tink i will propose to u and tell my parents..? i did tis cos i finally found someone who can control mi and let me be happy.. bt it seems tat i let u down and hurt u soo deep and nev able to be there to protect u. my actions might nt really show u wat i mean bt i also treasure e times and things u did for mi.. i really hope for ant chance.. pls"

after hearing tis wat he say... i gave him ant chance and cont to improve in our r.s

2007-08-28T19:57:00.000+08:00

yest was my one and only papers i had.. well did study for it bt it seems tat i done it wrong.. haiz... bt hopefully can pass lah... tis sem really lost mood to study as too many things had happened and was too stress.. met up wit my poly mates for dinner at clarke quay and den went over to rage for drinks.. was quite fun and happening.. as tis gp always full of craps and lame jokes.. haha.. (tat is lot of pics.. bt lian havnt send mi.. haiz) i going to miss them as we are going seperate for 3mths for attachment.. bt if working same area stil can meet up for lunch or dinner.. its so fast.. tat i left last sem to finsih my course.. i miss them alot.. keke..

2007-08-26T00:30:00.000+08:00

yest after work met up wit joyce and sally.. company joyce to shop for her LV bag again.. den went to nydc for chat.. den meet sally liao den we proceed to rage lor.. went next door for dinner den back to pub.. sit there drink and sing lor.. til later part.. ah seng, kelvin they all came lor.. den play games and drink lor.. den joyce went back 1st.. den ah seng sent mi home..was dame tired sia...

tdy, woke up @ 3pm lor.. cannot believe it sia.. nobody call mi to wake up as i was so sick cum super tired.. haha.. den slack after lunch den sleep back.. haha den woke up eat again and watch tv.. den went to boy home and up load pics and blog lor.. while he is doing his stupid stuffs.. haiz.. stil considering want to cont anot... shall see how bah.. sian.. mon exam i stil havnt study.. no mood sia.. haha.. ciaoz..

2007-08-22T23:58:00.000+08:00

Went holiday for 3days 2nights to genting.. was a wonderful and enjoyable trip for mi.. @ last i can put e.ting aside and enjoy myself.. is been a long time i am so relax..

day1, reach there ard 230pm den check in to 1st world hotel.. which is CMI lah.. haha.. den after spend e whole afternoon til dinner time shopping @ 1st world hotel and genting hotel.. den went lake view resturant to have dinner and den went casino and look look.. den went back room and slept..

day2, woke up early to check out and wen for lunch and den check in at genting hotel.. e room was dame big and of cos more like a hotel room .. haha.. den change and went start going to theme park and play.. most of e rides we play bt e Q was dame long lah.. e last one was e water splash.. we were lucky to sit e ride as it was raining when we manage to get onto e boat.. den went back room to bath and change.. den went to good friends resturant for dinner.. e food was much beta den lake view.. after tat took a stroll outside enjoy e cold brezze.. den went back to 1st world to play indoor rides and see e 4D video.. much later we went to genting casino .. it was much bigger den 1st world sia.. and stood there seeing ppl playing ... til ard 3plus am den went back room sleep.. haiz.. tml go back sg liao..is soo fast.. hw i wish longer break.. haha..

day3, woke up and check out.. den after tat went for lunch den went to 1st world to get e things i wan to buy.. manange to get my shoes and some things for my parents and frens.. den took afternoon coach back to sg... it was a long journey.. reach sg ard 9pm.. den took cab home.. i miss e holiday.. shall go again..

2007-08-17T00:28:00.000+08:00

e.ting seems so dramatic.. i cant believe my own eyes... was @ spa wit joyce tdy... den went to cartel for dinner.. yest i left a note to jereko and say tat by tdy 12am if he can find mi.. i will give ant chance if nt e.ting come to an end... while i was having dinner, his frem sms mi & say he started searching for mi.. bt did he find mi????

i saw wen kai @ white sand.. and spoken to him for awhile den i decide to walk home and pass e fishing pond.. i sat @ there for a while and was tinking wat i shld i do??? i really confuse and lost.. one ting after other keep happening.. i really lost my mind...my brain cells.. n suddenly i felt so sick.. n was having fever.. when i started to walk back.. nev tht that i will see him.. i saw boy in front of mi... i u-turn and walk away.. dono wat to do.. bt in e end i appreare and he was soo happy. bt do i??? he tok to mi alot of thing bt as i was feeling very cold. he took mi home.. and fed mi wit med.. n pat mi to zzz. during tat period he was so sweet.. bt i dono wat i wan??

tdy, after work i went to his house.. fed his dogs and pack his room.. slept for awhile and wash his clothes.. den slack ard and tink wat i wan?? wrote some notes and left in his room.. wonder he take hw long to see?? and reply mi.. very tired.. wan to rest and get faster cure from my sick.. keke.. shall wats e conclusion..

2007-08-15T00:14:00.000+08:00

after work went to meet up wit my two lovely gers.. went to hereen-village and had our dinner.. den went down to rage... den later shi bf came & fetch mi to dragonfly.. not too many ppl to my surprise... bt stil quite enjoy.. den in bet.. alot of thing happen.. don wish to say liao.. Anyway.. happy birthday to SHi.. my beloved fren.. see her having a proper bf liao.. happy for her.. hope she treasure.. :)

2007-08-13T11:08:00.000+08:00

i dono wats going on recently.. jus don feel very gd and very confuse and dono wat to do???? ever since alot of ting have happen to us.. i trying to give in and put in effort.. i very envy most of frens.. as they are either marry already or have stable bf.. although there may be argument bt @ least is someone u like by ur side... as for us?? is like a love test tat we have to go thru so complicated r.s..

i learn to let go Gw for a period of time liao.. and put my heart to boy.. i dont deny tat he is a gd catch but dono jus certain things we cant slove & be honest. when things really happen den e truth will spilt out.. but i always let it be... i am nt angry bt disappointed... u always say tat i didnt do anything for u.. bt have u tht of e little thing i did.. which i nev did in my entire life wit my other ex.. i learn to control my temper and be nice.. tat too much to list wat i did?? bt tat doesnt count??? if u tink so den be it...

wat u did for mi?? is nt wat i wanted?? when u make mi sad or angry... u use $$ to pay back.. is tis wat i really wan??? have u ever asked??? do u understand mi?? hw much u noe abt mi??? i really dono whats going to happen?? u propose to mi.. n tis is e way u treat mi?? haiz...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lost of words~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2007-08-10T13:17:00.001+08:00

yESt weNt oUt wIt KoR aNd hIs FaMiLy.. wE went to LaO pA sA and have our dinner.. order alot of food sia.. den manage to see a bit of e fireworks.. nt bad... den after tat cont eating.. haha.. after e event @ marina bay.. alot of ppl came here and find food to eat.. tats tis pt of time.. when we are to finish our food.. we were ambush bt a gp of young punks..they keep looking @ us eating.. and i keep on laughing.. haha.. den after tat we walk ard.. bring e two kids to merlion.. fullerton hotel.. spore river.. and even play catching wit them.. was dame tired bt quite fun.. see them laughing and happy.. den after tat meet sally awhile to chat den went home...

2007-08-09T13:17:00.000+08:00

yeSt after test went to meet my two buddies @ bugis saki sushi.. we went there for dinner.. den after tat took a bus down to rage.. keke.. went there to finish e btl and also sing songs... after tat left ard 12plus.. den went tamp find shi n her bf.. den chat awhile.. her bt send mi home.. hmmm nt bad looking and is 101% better than jimmy...

i learn alot abt lifestyle recently... and things tat i see n tht in my mind really show mi alot of things... well.. i will jia you to work harder and achieve my goals... as for dear.. i stil considering.. ever since alot of things have been happening to us.. mayb is a test bet us bah... i shall see hw strong is our r.s we can maintain.. keke...

2007-08-02T12:58:00.000+08:00

i slightly happy abt my life... i gt my SIP liao... bt stil dono post to where... keke.. hmmm things have been picking up... i slightly more relax liao.. bt of cos stil have to work harder... i begin to let go gw... i noe i shld wake up fr my sleep.. tat he wont come back ever again.. i trying to treat ah boy gd.. so i can stay happy wit him... bt there are stil some things yet to be said.. one step @ a time bah...

recentyl, contact tiansong too.. it seems he is doing fine with his wife n life.. bt he always say: "as i say life can always be better".. haha.. i gt it... haha.. hmmm i also noe tat some of my pri sch fren and ite fren have been married.. haiz.. is like 2-3 yrs ago.. stil pak tok.. den suddenly all marry.. haha.. as long as u are happy wit wat u are doing.. go ahead.. once e chance slip.. no 2nd chance...

2007-07-15T12:41:00.000+08:00

hmmm.. things stil seems to be not gd... haiz.. one after another... bt i stil struggling to move on.. i was sooo stress that i broke down again... gt back a bit of depression... in e day i am stil ok.. bt nite falls.. i start to hurt myself... i dono hw long more can i cope... i felt so bad sometimes when i ignore ah boy... he is always there to help mi n treat mi gd.. bt i keep avoiding him... i don wish to hurt anyone... bt life always have to go onz.. lately been meeting joyce and sally for drinks @ rage... haiz.. ppl also gt prob so do i.. bt i really cant take it liao.. keke

2007-07-01T12:33:00.000+08:00

Tis month is my gd fren wedding.. although alot of things are beyond our control.. bt things stil go onz... happy for her tat she marry a gd guy.. bt @ e rite time??? haha... as long as she is happy can liao... went to marriott hotel for her wedding day.. i was e MC of e nite togather wit james... not bad.. 1st time being a MC stil perform okok.. haha.. was quite smooth for e whole event.. and we took some pics.. sisters... keke

2007-05-28T11:51:00.000+08:00

Finally, i gt to noe some truth... chris have been lying to mi all tis while... he and hilary have been 2gather for sometime and i jus gt to noe.. y must he lie... cant he stop lying... he once hurt mi.. den elyn.. nw enjoy wit ant person.. bt i believe his gf will also be cheated later on.. i nev came across such person... nw i open my big eyes n noe tat he is such a jerk.. watever he say i wont believe anymore,.,., anyway we havnt been contacting.. n i tink we wont ever again... is e same period again tat we lost contact.. WTH... i cant really be bother liao... he is nt worth to be angry at all..

2007-05-13T22:41:00.000+08:00

hmmm new updates.. recently been working wit eddie n e rest.. we also went K-box e other day.. & had a good session... bt den something happen bet sharon & thomas... haiz... later did sharon confess to mi lor.... well.. i have guess it correctly... haha.. bt hope e.ting can be slove..

well.. moshi moshi call mi n went down for interview.. although e pay wise not high bt i like e job scpoe... bt she havnt cfm mi yet.. next week den she will call mi.. den wing tai call mi for interview.. @ last after waiting for sooo long.. i really hope i can stay wit them... i like tis company as more offer n grat experience i can learn.. on top of tat i gt e job for june.. 2gather wit jj n angeleine... well.. since like things start to change a little better for mi.. i hope e.ting will pick up again n back to normal... Pls blessed us... hope to have more gd news coming up... tats all....

2007-05-09T22:31:00.000+08:00

been a long time tat i update tis blog.. having mood swing lately n quite disappointed over certain things... watever current suitation is happening i still can accept n try ways to slove bt i don wish to have stupid things that doesnt concern abt mi to happen... e other time chris sae his gf fren mes mi those stupid & lame mes... i was nt happy abt it when i know is who.. bt i kept quiet.. lately gt tis no again mes mi e same thing.. n his gf ne gf fren view my frenster a few times.. wat does tat mean??? come on.. after tis incident i stop contacting chris.. does not wan to listen or reply his mes.. or even meet him @ all...

i dono wat i shld do??? if tis cont i tink i will give up our frenship.. anyway i tink after he move away, we don have any chance to meet @ all... so now end mayb is a good ting... since he can even go out wit hilary to pubs.. movies..shopping n JB... n not wit mi anymore den wats e pt... don wish to be his coffee khaki only... n telling mi wats happening e.day... i dono y i jus hated it lah... havnt decided wat to do... haiz..

2007-05-05T22:11:00.000+08:00

Lately been quite busy wit work.. sooo didnt have e time to blog @ all.. welll have went to do my hair.. hmmm wasnnt really happy with it bt wat to do?? done liao... alot of ppl say nt nice... some sae ..... hmmm don care liao lah.. haha
hmmmm nth much thing happen... as usual gooo sch.. goo work... quite tiring bt den no choice... jinwei has been nice to me lately... thanks for ur care n corncern... i really touch.. bt den i still cant bring myself to be wit him... haiz.. we shall see bah.. haha

my new hair cut haha..

2007-04-30T01:00:00.000+08:00

haiz.. school started a week... welll e timetable was ok ok only lah.. cos mostly in e afternoon... bt e subj boring n e lecturers also very de lame... nth interesting....although is e 1st week bt very slack lor... hmmm in bet have been working... so far stil can cope.. bt scare in e later part.. i will be slack n tired somehow...bt den things wont change.. stil have to work n cope wit sch... hopefully i am able to do it.. Rite juliet.. (u are a strong ger... )haha..e past week end met up wit joyce n chris.. n also wei lor.. well well.. he really melt my heart wit e things he did..

when i was sick.. he cook for me...
when i injure my leg... he took mi to doc..n apply med for mi..
lately he start singing bedtime song for mi...
n been waking mi up like crazy..(cos i refuse to wake up)
he is trying to spend his spare time wit mi.. haiz...
i dono wat to say bt felt touch lor..
is been a long time tat some did such thing for mi....
e other day when i met him.. i jus hug him n cry...
i also dono y... bt after crying i felt so relieve....
bt im sorry...i know u been reading my bog n left mess..
TO yOu: I'm really sorry... don wan to be a burden to u anymore.. i wan u to lead ur own life.. n carry on doing things.. u suppose to do... mayb my actions or words may mislead u & let u tink u have e chance.. bt as @ e moment.. i wan to settle my thngs n be free fr e..ting.. i don wan to waste ur time... is nt worth @ all.. bt i really appreaciate watever u done for mi... thanks i really touch... bt sometime.. somewhere.. if we have fate.. we be 2gather..lastly... i really touch n happy.. thanks alot... muacks.. haha.. take care n lead ur life.. kkk....

2007-04-20T00:30:00.000+08:00

sian.. life havnt been too gd.. but den stil have to move onz... next week open sch liao... haiz... dono able to cont sch anot... waiting for reply to extend my payment for sch.... if they don approve den i have to quit bah... sian.... well well.. e.one has their own prob n ways to slove... bt it seems this time round i am lost.. complete lot..k lah.. gt to get some sleep..lately also stay up quite late...

2007-04-19T02:45:00.000+08:00

been meetin joyce recently
she has married and tink she made e wrong choice
bt den she has no choice cos her hubby is gd
wat to do.. cos she accept his propose on impluse
haha... gt nth to say sia...
she has to chose bet freedom or wealth n status
nth is perfect... u cant have both...
so she lost her freedom... bt for wat i noe.. she is trying hard to be pleased
hope she can come up wit an ans.. or wat she really wan..
to divorce or cont tis road down..

as for mi... actually i didnt accept wei @ all.. bt den he has been nice to mi
he has been given mi moral support n by my side all tis while...
i dono wat to do... nw i am stil stuck in my prob....
thing don seems to work... wat have i done to deserve such treatment...
haiz.. tired of life...
tired of work bt stil have to hang on til i find a new one...
have been quite stress n stress in work... alot of things have change..
bt stil have to face it cos if i quit my job i wont have income...
no income means no sch. no home.. wat also don have...
have been praying soo hard.. asking how to slove e prob
y tis happen again n again... i really tired... really lost hope..
wat shld i do??????????????

2007-04-15T00:44:00.000+08:00

yest have a good time after work... went dragonfly wit shi, ling, du jian &chris... wes dame f pack lah... bt slowly manage to find a spot @ e bar counter... haha.. as usual wit our drinks.. fun.. laughter... was quite happening... n we take turn to play 5-10.. haha.. @ 1st chris start to lose.. follow by me den du jian.. hmmm have all eentertainment.. left ard 5am.. share cab wit them.. den went to sleep.. as tml have to go church... really miss going club wit him.. haha.. haiz... tdy was too tired.. so slept nearly e whole day...

2007-04-12T22:43:00.000+08:00

haiz.. tis few days hasnt been gd for mi lor... felt soo useless.. unable to find a job.. n have to worry soo many things... see my parents e.day fight over xxxxx and make himself soo stress... my savings also left nt much liao... mayb only able to cover til june..bt wt abt my expeness n sch... haiz... really felt very lost...n tis is e 1st time i felt so miserable... e other day i met up wit jin wei... actually we agree exchage something for something.. haha end up.. he sae i crazy n scolded mi like crazy.... n he transfer mi $$... he sae he is serious in looking after mi.. n wont leave mi alone.. haha... he wan to be my bf... siao... 1st he is 2 yrs younger den mi.. 2nd i nw have sooo much prob.. 3rd.. i feel like ending my life... 4th.. i dono how to carry onz.. or which way to move onz...

yest went to wing tai interview.. hopefully i get e job... bt til nw nobody call.. i jus need watever job to support tis family y cant i get it.... send sooom any emails none reply... interview soo many no repsond.. i even scarfise my sch time to go work.... y cant i jus get it..nev felt dame lost n ?????? .. tat day didnt went home so went to wei place... nearly kill myself bt stop by him... got scolded like hell lah... well well.. i really dono lah.. see wat GOD plan for mi... i jus hope my whole family will get thru tis time.... n i promise i will earn big $$ to let thme live comfortable.. as for now... see wat i can do...

anyway thanks jin wei... although i only noe u like 1 yrs plus.. bt u are there for mi when i really depress till no wher to go... all my frens dono gooo where...tat is y i believe... nev TRUST IN ANYONE ACCEPT URSELF... NO ONE WILL HELP U.... nt even UR FRENS... FRENS ARE ONLY FOR FUN & LAUGHTER.. when trouble comes.. ALL RUN AWAY.... hahahahahahahaha......................... crapps.

2007-04-08T21:25:00.000+08:00

yEst had a great time with kor and his khakis... went to have our dinner @ cafe cartel.. they order those combo type.. n 3 diff type sia.. eat til e.one wan to vomit.. haha.. hmmm e food not bad.. have lots of jokes and dun during dinner...HAiz.. kOr paid For mI... aLtHOugH is bEen yeArs wE neV really contact bt is dao sao is de one who keep calling mi.. haha.. bt he treat mi not bad.. really look after mi... den after tat we planned to go drink de.. sO went to jimmy workplace @ clarke quay... but end up tooo pack for 10 of us... So end up went to MOS... was quite happening n pack like siao... den lao da open one btl... den i n christine quite enjoy de.. haiz den she suddenly mood swing n keep crying.. end up.. e.one have to leave cos of her.. hmmm a bit spoilt mood.. den end up went down to DRAGONFLY....

LefT> JiMmy & ChrIstinE

Right> mOi & ChrIstInE & dAo sAO

LeFT>QINg LoNg & mOi

RigHt> LaO dA & mOi

LefT> MoI & dAO sAO

RigHt> mOi & kOR kOR

yaP.. tOok cab down to Dragonfly... den meet up wit shi, ling and jie... den share table wit jie frens which is right in front of e stage... wooooo power sia... quite fun... actually i do enjoy bt is dame pack lah.. haha.. den play 5-10 den drink drink.. den noe tis "cute "guy.. haha took pic wit him.. ohh... den went home ard 5plus in e morn.. ohh.. was dame late lah.. went home.. dad awake liao.. haha... den faster bath n sleep.... Thanks t o my tis butch of frens... they help mi to release stress...

LefT> e CutE gUy & mOi... RigHt> mOi n GuItarEss Live bAnd

E fOuR oF uS aGaIn... Jie/LiNg/ShI & mOi

2007-04-07T16:42:00.000+08:00

since i have not been working... i tink i have been going club.. last week.. almost e.day.. haha.. n i tink i fall sick fr there... n jus pass thur.. i again went wit my khaki... they are nw my latest club frens.. haha.. went down interview wit angeline den meet sharon @ orchard.. walk walk.. den went party world awhile with andy... haiz.. no voice stil wan to sing.. den break voice again lor.. haha... bt was quite fun lah... den meet up wit thomas.. wan n sharon frens... again to bb face... tis time round think drink e most sia.... we open 3btls.. cum e balance we have e other day... was quite happening... haha... n lots of craps.. joke.. fun & dance...

den i saw tis cute guy sitting beside our tbl... he gt style sia.. like tis type.. bt see only lah... den after time to go home... den saw him again. bt was dead drunk lah.. den his frens held up to the walk way... i dono wat i trying to do.. bt jus wan to help them make him awake... so i gave him a hot sweet.. n help him massage his neck so he sober a little.. den he keep saying pain pain.. ask mi to stop.. den i say... soon u be ok.. den he grab my hands.. n slowly his frens cant hold his weight.. so he lean on me.. haha.. ok lah.. nt trying to wat lah.. bt @ least i help someone to wake up... den his frens sae thanks to us.. den went home lor.. haha.. haiz.. den e next day super manage to wake up for church... dono y die die feel like going church esp is GOOD friday...

after which i went to work lor.. haiz. . jus noe e rest gt alot to tok... keep on asking how ta guy>?? haiz.. i jus ignore them.. haha.. den after work went to MR. Bean wit shi.. have some snacks n drinks.. den chat abt e past n present lor.. haha.. den went home Zzzzz. .. ok lah.. tink tis holiday i really do enjoy.... rather den work n work..haha... k lah.. going meet.. dao sao n e gang for dinner.. up date again..

2007-04-04T16:17:00.000+08:00

well... lately mood nt really gd.... dono y... alot of things have happen.... jus cannot take it anymore...dono i can hold on how much longer... y y y y y things must always happen on mi... one after ant.... settle one thing come ant.. y cant i jus live a happy n simple life.. y must GOD take away e.thing from one jus over nite... wat have i done to deserve such treatment... anit im a gd person who risk my life.. my time.. my sleep.. my energy.. my love... my e.ting for ppl ard mi... (family... frens.. GOD...)den y do i deserve such treatment for nth... y must it be me??? i took alot of hardship... gone thru alot of stress... gone thru a painful life... gone thru e dark side of e world... for how long.. ever since i was young... over 20years.. isnt it enough for mi.... i work sooo hard.. all my effort.. doesnt pay off anythng good in return.... i don ans much.. to have watever i wan i will have bt jus a simple peaceful life..

and finally i get to noe a truth which i have wanted to noe for almost 2ys.. C current gf... is really e ger b4 mi... n i guess y we ended must be her... i don really feel sad bt super disppointed... y must he lie to mi... i used to like him soo much gave up soo many unhappy things n be gd to him n treat him soo gd... bt is tis e thing i gain in e end???? i long time doesnt have a gd r.s liao.... all come n go like freeflow.. haha... maybe tats really my life n fate bah... wat to do.... sometimes i even wish i am dead... bt y i cant??? my time is nt up??? i need to suffer how much longer???? am i born to have such life???? wat wrong have i done????

family.... frens.... love.... money.. sch.. job... life... haiz.............. gt nth much to say.... if tats my life to be.... i have to accept lor.... wat to do... tink i wish to have depression beta... so wat also no need to be trouble.. e.day being crazy is e best... hahahahahahaha......................................................... thanks really thanks.. i must apperciate e life i have...........

2007-04-02T15:29:00.000+08:00

didnt really work much tis week.. was quite quiet... so keep going drink n meet up wit some old frens... haiz.. seeing one by one getting beta... well.. well... hmmm sat after work meet up with chew yan.. went MS shop shop & as usual went for drinks n chat abt e past.. haha.. it was sooo fun when we recall and after tat went shop shop alone b4 meeting up wit e rest for club...

spending tis time alone.. i see sooo many ppl walk up n down.. the things they did.. i felt like is really short... nw watever things u are doing u must enjoy.. time pass very fast... n theres no turing back.... so enjoy urself while you can... 9plus met up wit andy, thomas and sharon... den went down BB face.. level 3... starting was a bit boring.. bt later onz... was quite fun... took some pic... drink like siao.. haha.. really enjoy clubbing wit them.. as they are dame joker n funny.. haha... thanks guys.

.

2007-03-29T17:50:00.000+08:00

recenty e past weeks havnt been good for me.. actaully b4 CHinese New Year.. started all tis prob.... i dono where to move on... or wat i shld do... use to be a happy little ger bt nw become a useless n meaningless ger... i have lost control of a lot of things... y is my life getting worst... n y cant i live a noraml life.... jus a simple n lifestlye.. i don ask to be rich.. i don ask for a good living.. bt jus a simple n pain lifestlye.. y GOD hasnt show his way...i don mind to suffer for family n frens bt how long more do i need to do tis to lead back a normal life????

i have no one to run to ... accept myself... haiz... FRENS???? hahahhahahahahahahahhahaha... i really wake up my mind..... frens are only meant for FUN... when u are down in trouble.. DO U TINK THEY HELP??? NO!!! they pretend to listen bt cant do anything... or i shld sae run far far away..well... i been thru such thngs... n noe it... n i dono whether i stil have a family.. a shelter.. a sch... a job to move on.... e.thing may jus drop from 100 to 0.....

e past few days have been going drinking.... n nearly lost my voice.... dono y..got no job.. cant find one... nth to do.. scare of gettng depression again.. so went drinking wit frens....well.. i noe e prob wont slove.. bt @ least i wont stess every single sec... i have a free mind for few hours.. ..... gt nth nmuch to sae.... tired... really tired....

2007-03-23T02:34:00.000+08:00

over e past 4 days(18/3-21/3/07) STAR VIRGO.. 1st time going there.. we going penang and puket... took many pics... really enjoy tis bd treat...

18/3> 1st day on board.. check in @ 2pm den went to leave out lauggage in e cabin... den have our cocktail drink... after tat went to eat @ e 13th level cafe... n watch some performance... den walk ard e ship..explore some outlelts.. den headed back to room to unpack all our things.. den headed for dinner and casino and drinks @ one of e bar,,, den back to cabin to zzzz...

19/3> wake up 11plus den have outr lunch... den proceed to peanag offshore.. went for a few hours tour den back to ship.. den went to have our dinner den went casino ... den again back to ur drinks.. n dance... den back to cabin..

20/3> woke up 6plus for breakfast... den proceed to puket... e place was dame nice... den few hours tour.. den back to ship for our gala-dinner... e food was dame great... den again to casino.. n went for shows... n back to our drinks... haha.. den back to cabin...

21/3> was e last day.. so sleep til quite late.. den went for lunch.. n walk round e ship... den went for dinner.. haiz.. soo fast back to sg... sian.. b4 departing we went for drinks again.... haha.. e trip was quite fun.. n wish to go again... really enjoy myself.... below are some pics.. i took.... fr e cruise inside.. to the offhshore trip i go... n also most of all.. e FOODS... yummy.... e food really BEST sia.. haha.. n also e drinks lah... for e 1st time i drank soo many macargita....

the pics which i took in e ship...

e penage trip i went...

e puket trip i went...

most impt... e FOOD i had during my 4 days trip.... nev had such nice meals.....

2007-03-15T17:45:00.000+08:00

Oh.. tdy is moi bd.... bt didnt feel anything great or excited... well yest nite chris meet mi for dinner bt den.. didnt say much for my bd.. don tink he rem.. well.. is ok... anyway is doesnt matter mcuh.. only a bd mah.. haha.. tdy as usual went to work.. 1st time i work on my bd.. wat to do?? need money cum no one celebrate wit mi... was not sad or angry bt disappointed cos nobody sms mi to wish mi... haiz... well.. thanks to sharon, denny and andy for their ang bao present.. i was sooo pai seh.. they jus give mi cash when they jus noe by tdy..

after work went to shi home... slack & sleep awhile.. den meet angeline & lisa for steamboat.. we went to bugis.. e place seem ok ok lah... so we tried.. bt e food there are werid.. haha..we took some pics ... and after having a hard time eating.. we call for e bills.. bt we stil balance some food.. so e person make us pay extra $2.00.. over all stil nt too bad... den after tat wait for shi to call mi... cos going down dragonfly...

@ last we reach st james... den as we enter e entrance.. gguess who i saw.. my TP lects.. (Irene Chan & some biz sch lect..) dEn we share table wit anoth group.. we open 2 btls in total.. drink til quite high.. loong time nev drink til like tat.. haha.. den gt to noe 2 guys and 1 ger... enjoy e life-band and dance... and we took some pics... keke... til e nite.. stil no one sms and wish mi.. well.. suai le bah...

2007-03-12T15:40:00.000+08:00

e past one week had been busy working non-stop.. most of e time working 19 hrs of work.. 2 hrs of transport.. 3 hrs of sleep.. for a day.. n X 7 days..=???? wat to do.?? in need of $$$ super badly so jus work 1st... enjoy can do it ant day.. anyway i always suffer very ji lat den enjoy a bit... well my bd is coming liao.. bt didnt look forward it tis year... have a nt gd feeling bah... haha.. hmmm havnt been meeting chris so far... dono y.. jus don feel like... & jinhua has been calling mi... didnt tok much too... haiz...

2007-03-03T05:11:00.000+08:00

@ Last Exam Are OvER...... bt a bIt dIsaPpOiNted in mY LaSt paPer.. gAVe aWay 30 marks.. cOs i didnt study e chap @ aLL.. haIz.. sUai Le bah.... afTer eXam.. wEnt tO ChInatOwn fOr LunCh wIT Ang.. haO.. teCk.. bOss.. Jj.. & Lisa.. dEn aFtER tAt i heAd fOr wOrk.. & e rEsT wEnt TO cELebRaTe LisA bd... hMmm Nth mUch tO uPdAte... fR tMl oNwArds.. wIL be deaMe bUsy WIt wOrk...

2007-02-28T17:15:00.001+08:00

haiz.. is exam... exam... so sian sia... 3 papers have gone... bt it seems i not going to score... cos i have been sick.. n didnt really study... bt hopefully can get through... haiz.. well gt nth much to update... jus faster finish exam den i can start my work liao.. haha. over e week, i have been going down to hospital seeing ah-mei.. she is really fighting very strong.. she has been in coma for 2 time nd tis time round she has woke up but she cant rem me.. i was quite sad lah.. bt e doc say maybe she in coma for soo long tats y her brain didnt work well.. she has been discharge yest according to my dao sao.. i feel very guity over wat have happen.. i dono how to face her and her dead bro... i feel soo useless & helpless which i cant do anything at all.. e.ting have to depend on dao sao.. she also has her own life.. she has been tied for 15 years liao.. remain single and looking after ah- mei.. i really cannot 4give myself... anyway thanks dao sao... u will be bless by a gd guy in future.. go search for ur future and leave mei to mi... she will leave u one day as she grow older... well... to HIM: i noe u been reading my blog.. i jus wan to sae.. give mi sometime to tink over abt our r.s.. i noe u might be e one for mi.. bt i'm nt prepare nw.. tats alot of thing happening ard mi.. n none of e prob is solve.. i noe u wan to stay by me.. bt i don wan to be selfish.. I LOVE U SOO MUCH SO I MUST LEAVE U SO THAT I WONT HURT U SOO DEEP. I RATHER HURT MYSELF AND SUFFER THE PAIN DEN TO SEE THE ONE I LOVE I LOVE IN PAIN. thanks alot... i always rem...

2007-02-28T17:15:00.000+08:00

went to boon house... have steamboat dinner... den games.. chats... and most of all photo-taking..

My buddies.... i love u all...

Some nice & sutpid pose we took...

The Tay Family(daughter, granny,son-in-law,2 grand-children)

The Tan Family (Son, granny, daughter-in-law, 2 grand-children)

Our Famliy photo for 2007

2007-02-20T23:35:00.000+08:00

little update of e places i went during chinese new year.. haiz 4 get to take pics.. haha...
18/2 First day of new year, actualy is stay @ home de.. cos 2nd day den go aunt house.. bt den dao sao they all keep asking mi to go over to thier house n gamble.. cos e rest of them are coming over.. haha.. den christine keep calling mi lah... end up.. went down lor.. enjoy myself and won some $$$ b4 i left.. haha.. den meet winnie and sally @ fishermanV.. went there to drink and chat lor... til ard 3 plus am den went home.. haiz.. nt very happy abt them.. drink alittle bit like siao char bo.. make soo much noise want to draw attention of e behind table... suai le...

19/2 Went out later... went to aunt house wit dad.. travel all e way to clementi.. haha.. den saw cousin & their kids lor... one by one gave mi ang pao.. haha.. den have our dinner there.. every yr is e same dish... bt den is nice.. have some chat wit cousin hubby... and also play the new tech UNO game wit the g\hubbies and kids.. all enjoying themselves... den we took a big family photo.. tis yr include new-born baby ERnest.. and sis also... after tat went to meet christine go drinking.. den went home ard 3 plus.. oh .. i have been drinking again tis few days sia.. back to the same old days.. haha

20/2 Tis is e day i been waiting for.. cos i can see my god-newphew..kor and dao sao... cos e last time i saw them is last yr CNY lah.. haha.. went there ard 3 plus cos have to study a bit b4 coming out... den sit there play wit josh and tok to kor lor.. den eat @ his home again.. den play majong wit his mon n his god sis... haha.. lost $2 only.. so stil okok... den after tat.. unlce call mi and ask mi to company him go eat supper... @ e same time pass mi ang pao.. haha.. so xin fu rite... den went home lor... haiz..

tis is joshua and mi... he soo cute rite.. he has slim down comapre to last yr.. haha

2007-02-18T03:06:00.001+08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR.... is the celebration again... but don have e mood to enjoy much cos have to study for exam.. sian sia... well yest went do kor(tim) house to eat steamboat dinner.. they a big gathering wit their frens... i feel so out lah... cos i dono anyone.. bt den i do enjoy after awhile... all of them are joker and friendly... nice knwoing know them.. after tat we play cards lor... den after we went down to chinatown walk walk.. have alot of fun with them... esp one of the guy sooo dame joker... after walking ard.. we went to eat... (supper?? breakfast?) cos is like 4 am in the morn.. haha.. den uncle came to pick mi up.. and den home sweet home lah...

dEn today.. wake up quite early.. to pack all my stuffs.. havnt gt e time to do it @ all.. soo pack & pack lor.. bt it seems i gt less rubbish liao.. haha.. den prepare for reunion dinner with my family.. tis yr jie jie is able to join us... yuppie... after dinner.. went to meet sally & chris for coffee.. have a gd time chatting wit them den went home.... :)

2007-02-17T11:27:00.000+08:00

HAPPY VALENTINES' DAY..... andy company mi go do passport.. den i hand ard @ dear shop den went to sch.. den after tat went to shi home and rest for awhile... later meet up wit andrew tong , ling & dear go bugis shop shop & eat lor.. den in e end only e 3 of us.. wondering ard... tinking where to go.. den we jus park one side n chat chat n tink @ e same time.. end up went to dragonfly... hmmm e atmosphere is nt bad bt hated e ppl there.. super no manners de lor... den we drank bucket... phew.. beer are sooooo awful sia... bt manage to finish up all my btls... den took uncle cab home.. went down to pick thomas marcus they all... jereko propose to mi.. he siao liao... he say alot of things to me.. he want to take care of mi.. & really hope i give him a chance.. i dono y ... really dono y... bt den i didnt accept @ all.. loss of words. confuse... haiz... den i quickyly go home.. was dame tired and & next day morn lesson.... haiz.... tats how i spend my V day.. sian...

2007-02-17T11:21:00.000+08:00

yest have a great time @ sch.. was dame tired waking up sooo early to go for lect den after tat went for lunch & celebrate xue bd.. e trick was dame gd respond.. she dono a single ting tat wat we are doing.. gt her a bd cake and a bodyshop present.. everyone have some little fun and enjoying eating e cake.. after tat went for e stupid comm skills lah.. for only like 20min.. wth?????? den @ nite went to meet chris... chatted awhile den went home... haiz..........

2007-02-13T00:19:00.000+08:00

tdy was dame tired when going to sch.. couldnt really open my dame eyes sia.. cos over e wk end didnt get to sleep @ all.. was working fr morn til nite den cont morn til nite den cont morn til nite.. haha.. bt yest when i reach home ard 2 plus i really sleep like pig lor.. was sooo tired lah.. well.. tdy gt back some result.. hmmm wasnt really happy abt it lor... i feel that i can do beta so that final yr.. i can score As again..

store mgt= assesment (A) term test (B+) nearly (A) by 1/2 mark
fashion merchandise= proj (B) quiz (A) term test (D)
Crm= proj (A) term test (D+) overall (B+)
advertising & promotion= term test (B+)..... to be cont....

hmmm overall is like 50-50 chance of scoring As.. haiz.. gpa is not tat gd liao cum nw stil don ger As no chance liao.. oh ya.. e stupid SIP thing is out.. haiz.. lect told mi all 100% self-source e retailer unless we cant get den go to them.. well.. well.. still tink of wat retailer to find leh.. must go one by one and ask for intership.. y cant they jus give us a list so we can chose....

kk.. enough of my naggggging...new year is coming.... bt too bad no no celebration cos have to study... haiz.. suai le.. wat to do... oh ya.. kor sis stil in coma sia.. i was still sad over it lah.. bt den @ e same time soo busy til i gt no time to visit her.. anyway during new year going to see her.. hopefully she is awake by that time.. k lah.. time to zzzzz

2007-02-09T12:30:00.000+08:00

been busy with own stuffs.. welll... CNY is ard e corner but den i don feel any excitment at all cos... tis yr will be very diff for mi... no new clothes.. no new year celebrations... n it wont be a good year for mi.. although tis yr is PIG yr which is my year but beginning of e year soooo many things have happen.. watever it is.. i am used too liao... so be it...

tink i will remain to be a loner which i used to be in e past... i jus wan to be left alone.. n stay in my nutshell.. i don need love.. i don need frens.. i don need help... i don need anything.. i jus wan to be alone.. sooo.. i hope i jus die there w.o anyone knowing.. since e suffering is there for mi to bear i don wan to put anyone wit mi.... once i'm no longer here.. e.ting will be fine.... haha..haha...

as for jereko.. i'm sorry that we cant be 2gather anymore... i don wan u to suffer wit mi... thanks for e.ting u done 4 mi... i will pay u back asap... although i did like u very much.. bt i need to let go of u... it may hurt both of us.. bt time will heal.. sorry... watever things i promoise u... i will do it.. :) muacks....

e heart beat drops.................................................................

2007-02-04T21:33:00.000+08:00

helloooooo.. havnt been updating my blog.. cos was really dame busy, sick and stress... tis past days alot of things had happened... bt i tink i stil can cope.. kor sister admited to hosptial cos she was bitten up tat FuCker and she was soo badly injure til she was in coma,,, den after she was slightly beta.. till she bled again and nw stil in coma for 3days liao.. really very sad over tis incident.. if she will to die i will nev 4give myself.. cos i cause her brother to die.. haiz.. hope e.ting will be fine.. at e same time i also hoep dao sao take care of herself.. she also tired bet work n sis...

haiz... beiginning of e year only.. so many ting has happen... maybe wat i predict really will happen... oh ya.. fri nite i gt a bad news.. he lost his job... when i heard it, i was quite sad... in my mind keep tinking alot of things... and also keep asking myself Y always mi??? what have i done to deserve such treatment.. i don wan to suffer e,ting n hold onto e burden... bt y happen to e ppl ard mi... i cant accept the fact... i really hope e.ting goes well i pray hard tat both he n she can get a job soon... as for mi i wil work hard n try to balance my sch to help in..

actually i very tired liao.. supper tired... i already fell down... bt no support @ all.. haiz.. bt nvm.. cos i wil try to stand up again myself.. watever it is.. tat is always a way to solve e prob bah... i hope soo... actually i tht of giving u studies and go out to work,,,, help out watever ting i can.. really very sad and tired,,, :0 see how bah.. after tis sem exam.. see hws e result..if didnt score well mayb stop sch bah... tats no choice,... haiz.... .... .............. ............ how ... ..... ....

2007-01-28T18:40:00.000+08:00

I'm back in blogging again.. been rather busy wit projs and work lately.. haiz.. dame tired and sick of it.. havnt been sleeping well @ all.. when my gp memebers all sleeping soundly i stil working on it till 4 plus in e morn over a period of time.. haiz.. i was sooo piss off and disappointed of having such gp members... everything also dono how to do.. or else is give f crap work... end up i have to edit for them like siao... y cant they do their part earlier @ least we can discuss abt it.. all last min work... i hated gp projs lor... cos i will nev score of well cos of tat... n if i wanted to i have to do their work for them in e end... having mentally stress over tis period...

reflect back e time in ITE , i tink my gp members are more responsible and gave better report... mayb is e personality of e person bah... one more yr of studies n i don need to face such ppl... haiz.. wat has been done is done... wat to do... suai le bah... beside having stress in sch... also alot of prob have occured.. i have predict 2007 will nt be a gd year for mi... bt i surrender liao.. watever e ting tats going to happen or wat is e outcome.. i jus have to accept e fact.. nth can be control by me... no prevention.. no protection.. no support... wat also NOT..

e other day have an miscommunication wit Chris.. end up i was kena scold for nth.. tat was e 1st time he lose his temper n scolded mi !@$%%... was nt angry bt disappointed with him.. haiz... den lately also rejected jereko... i still tinking shld we cont.. even i have tht over that i will let go of GW liao... i jus accept e ans tat he have went back to Japan to stay bah.. n no longer returing back to Sg... in this case i can find my love on the other island...

yest... after work.. sally called mi.. ask mi to go choing wit ivan daniel and hui.. bt i rejected them.. although i feel like going bt gt my own reasons for rejecting.. haiz.. y i am unable to enjoy myself while others can.. been suffering alot and learning as i move along... mayb it doesnt benefit mi now bt in the future.. i alredy gave up my life and time to ...... i really hope is worth...

in 2007, i don have too much hope.. bt jus wish e.thing goes well and e.one stay healthy and happy.. haha.. as for myself.. i used to suffer den living in comfort.. so doesnt make a diff.. bt i hope my sickness can cure bah... n i stil can live another few more years.. :) and hopefully i can get to see GW ant time...haha...

2007-01-26T01:32:00.000+08:00

1. Do you know where your dad is rightnow? WoRkIng Lor
2. Last time you hugged someone? u mEan bOy oR gEr??iF bOy (one month ago) ger(last week)
3. What is something you've learnedabout yourself recently? bEaR wIt oThErs & bE "NICE"
4. What color is your watch? CrEaM coLoUr..
5. Do you like anyone? i LOVE hiM(GW) 4eVer eVeN e HeArT bEaT dRoPs....
6. Are you close to your mom? OkiE oKie LoR.. pReFer dAD.. hE iS gReAt..
7. Where do you work? aLoT LeH.. hOLding 2 jObS..
8. What are you listening to right now? Ta yI dInG hE aI nI (F.I.R)
9.what do you smell like? sWeEt & pLeAsEaNt.. haha
10. What color are your pants? bLaCk & bRowN
11. Closest thing to your left? OpEn dOoR
12. What color is your bedroom? LiGht puRpLe
13. Do you have a chair in your room? yAp
14. Time you were born? Hmmm cAnt rEm bT i nOe iS mOrn...
15. Do you know anyone who is engaged? Hmmm ShArOn.. oN 5jAn.. sO sWeet
16. What's your favorite number? 14
17. Do you know someone named Lori? hmm Is iT a sHoRt fOrM??
18. What color is your mom's hair? bLACk cUm LittLe bLoNd
19. Do you have a dog? no... bT hAve a dOg mAsTeR... haha
20. Do you remember singing any songs as a kid? ya.. jOiNg sCh choIr
21. When was the last time you went swimming?hmm.. 5Mths aGO..
22. When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings? tIs mOrn...
23. Did you ever go to a camp as a child? yes, It wAs FuN Lah..
24. Do you like fire? hmmm pReFer wAtEr
25. Are you allergic to anything? eSpRing.. as tYpe oF mEdiCine
26. When was the last time you cried? WhEnEvER i tHt oF hIm...
27. Have you ever been to a spa? yAp... nIce...
28. Did you take science all four years of high school? nO...
29. Do you like butterflies? yaP.. thEy aRe bEaTuifuL
30. What is one thing you miss about your past? e Fun & LauGhtEr i hAve wIt e gP oF FrEns
31. Have you ever seen the school counselor? nO
32. Have you ever wanted to be a teacher? nO.. iS a bOrIng jOb
33. What is one thing you've learned about life? eNjOy wHiLe u CaN, TrEaSuRe eVeRytHiNg u hAve in hAnd..
34. Are you jealous of anyone? nO pOiNt.. GOD hAs hIs waY fOr dIff ppl
35. Is anyone jealous of you? tInK sOo cOs ppL aLwaYs sAe mY eyEs vEry nIce.. haha
36. Ever been stuck in an elevator? yAp.. wIt a CutE uNkNown gUy
37. What does your dad call you? JuLoR eLsE.. sMaLL oNe..haha
38. What does your mom call you? JuLi3t
39. What does you hair look like right now? mEsSy.. UgLy.. TeRribLe.. haha
40. Has a friend ever used you? yAp.. sOmeOne i TuRsTed aLot.. bT sUaI Le..
41. Has anyone recently told you that they like you? Hmmm gT..bt nT e OnE i Like.. haha
42. What have you eaten today? BrEaD..
43. Is your hair naturally curly or straight? sLiGhtLy CurLy
44. What is your favorite movie? ah ha... good qns
45. Who was the last person you drove with? nO Lic dRovE whO sIa?? gHoSt..
46.what r u looking forward to? FaStEr FiNiSh sTudIeS & cOme Out tO wOrk..
47. How are you today?TiReD & sIck...

2007-01-18T00:40:00.000+08:00

Oh.. i'm back.. havnt been blogging.. due to lots of work to be done... haiz.. sick n & tired of everything... over e weekend was busy workng as usual.. haiz.. bt nw w/o eric ard no more fun liao.. oh ya.. tat day jereko mes mi and ask for ant chance.. he sae he wont mind if i stil have gw in my heart cos he will prove to mi.. he will replace gw in me... i also dono y i jus felt sad n confuse... i dono wat to reply and jus remain quiet.. haiz.. den mon was in operation.. sales slightly beta.. bt den also boring lah.. den as usual busy wit projs.... haiz.. stil gt some havnt even touch lor...

was dame piss of wit myself.. i make spoilt my comp.. e whole dame comp cant be switch onz... n i cant do my work.. hated myself sia... den end up borrow laptop fr my fren... den yest.. chris came over to help fix e internet ting.. bt end up he cant connect n help mi repair my comp... was sooo happy.. he fix it for... e.ting was back to normal.. n i can cont do my proj..keke..

as for jereko case.. i stil tinking wat i wan??? i admit tat i like him.. bt @ e same time i facing a lot of prob.. i don wish to be his burden and end up having argument.. i happy tat nw we remain like frens.. bt i noe he stil treat mi as his gf... wat shld i do??? really confuse & tired... k.. need to rush for proj.. wil update again...

2007-01-12T17:30:00.000+08:00

tdy, i was nt in a gd mood... i also dono y.. jus felt very sad.. confuse... stupid... watever... i decided to end e r.s wit my bf... becos of a invisible guy.. i dono y... i noe e ans myself bt i chose not to accept and cont waiting.. cos deep down in my heart.. he lives in me.. n suddenly i also tink back abt e past.. tht of many things.. e EXs i have b4.. e company.. e laughter.. e happy & sweet moment... e sorrow.. e arguement we had share togather during our BGR... bt it seems everything has change.. they have move on & living a beta life.. as for mi... i stil prefer to stay in my shell and being a fool to cont waiting.. mayb tats e my fate & nt e life i wan to live... Anyway, thanks to these few guys who really share alot of things wit me.. & i learn alot of things on them.. They are e best bfs i ever had...

2007-01-12T03:05:00.000+08:00

havnt been able to update anything, was busy wit sch projs n e 1st ave in sch.. haiz.. was dame piss off wit 02 class.. cos they didnt even do a proper stock check lor.. & i have one piece missing & dono fly to where sia.. haiz.. bt sales was getting better... oh ya.. i n boy bo more liao... tat day we have a gd tok... watever he sae i jus kept quiet... i dono wat shld i sae... he told mi to tink abt it, actually wat i wan.. if my heart can give him an ans den look for him again... bt meantime he wil cont to support in """" .....he said: " If i am meant for him, no matter how i will go back to him, no pt wasting time when i half-hearted"... actually i was quite sad when he said that.. bt after awhile i was ok & freedom again.. keke... i also dono wats wrong wit mi lah...

btw.. tis 2 days has been meeting up wit chris.. went for dinner and catch up wit each other... well.. well.. i dono y i gt such a weird feeling.. i tink i have given up chris bt somehw whenever i hear he toking abt his gf or his fren mention tat.. i nt happy abt it... i jus hated them toking abt his GF... really don understand myself....haiz....anyway i have set up a online-selling.. bt is nt fully settle.. bt jus take a look n support... add: fusion-wardrobe.blogspot.com

2007-01-09T01:46:00.000+08:00

sat/sun........
been busy over e wk end... work..work.. work... and has lots of fun... and also preparing for e 1st ave on Mon... meet up with chris and have a good chat... den saw ru ji and his fren.. den he join us awhile...

tdy, 1st Ave opening.. everything was in a mess.. price tag nt up... inventory confusing... everything was in order... and do e briefing @ 12PM lah... and open e store @ 1220PM.. but lucky everything went smoothly... e opertation was a success.. we done advertising.. direct selling.. bt e traffic flow was very slow... haiz.. well.. sales was so bad... like $30 only lah... after sch went home.. den meet chris for coffee... til 10plud den went home.. hmm chatted wit shi and jun over e phone... den is time to sleep now...

haiz.. boy.. till nw havnt contact mi... i tink i noe e reason liao... mayb e feeling is true... watever.. tml i will call him if he don pick up den 4get it... haiz......

2007-01-06T01:14:00.000+08:00

iS a nEw sCh tErm.. n theres alot of thing to be done.. 1st is e 1st ave.. 2nd projs projs.. n assement.. sooo many thing to be completed... e past two days, was busy with e set-up.. from e painting to interior fixtures and hanging of merchandise.. yest.. xue, jia and fiza came my house to do advertising proj.. fiza be e model and we took pics of her wearing e merchandsie and later they help mi with e price tag til quite late den after they left i went to do CRM online.. den went to slep.. as for tdy.. went to set up e merchandise.. everything has complete.. bt it seems alot of conflict in e store.. as alot of things are nt done cum soo many wan to do things in their own way.. haiz i cant be bother liao lah..hopefully mon can start operation..

hmm tdy ah boy suppose to be back fr overseas bt den he didnt even contact mi @ all.. so i went to call his hp and find out that he is back lor. nt really angry lah bt disappointed lor.. well watever ans or things that is going to happen i also surrender liao. nt going to be bother that much... kk gtg.. hope mon is a good day...

2007-01-02T23:07:00.000+08:00

iS ant new year 2007.... have a great new year eve with my frens.. it seems like every year i will celebrate with new groups of frens.. cos most of my frens are settle down wit family & their partner & i am left alone again... bt always with new ones.. meet up with my working frens.. went to barcode for drinks.. open 3 btls chivas.. bt didnt drink tat much cos ny feeling well.. have alot of fun.. n when countdown time.. e whole place was in a mess sia.. everyone spraying e snow foam on everyone... n i took alot of pics.. lol.. it was soo fun lah.. den after tat cont our drinking n game session.. den later.. sally n daniel join us.. play til morn den went home.. den new year slep til quite late... den tdy went to work @ PS.. help peggy to look after e push cart til 9plus den went home wit sally.. haiz..

2006-12-30T21:31:00.000+08:00

Is gOing to e end of 2006.. soo fast ant year as gone... lately something happen to mi.. and i dono shld i be happy tat i am stil alive and recovering.. e past days..i have high fever , vomited and xian tu zi like hell lah... waterve thing i consume regardless food or water i jus vomit out... and my fever didnt went down @ all. i was dame f cold lah.. den also very hard to breath... @ e moment i really tink that i am going to die lah... nev have such experience b4.. den suddenly, i really hope tat i gone lor.. so i can no need to face anymore probs and rest in peace.. bt somehw GOD didnt wan to take mi away... he let mi recover n cont living... bt i really sick of living such life... i really prefer to be gone...

e other day, meet jes and roy they all to discuss abt e 1st ave ... i also didnt really hear wat they sae.. was dame sick.. n worst i couldnt control and vomited out and everyone was so shock and they went to buy something soure for mi to eat.. haha den later den went home to rest .. haiz..

2006-12-25T15:01:00.000+08:00

Is chirstmas... christmas... yest had a gd time.. even tht is only 4 of us.. haha.. went to meet sally, cy, daniel @ MS to eat dinner... den after tat went shop shop... den after went to suntec coffee bean sit down & chat chat.. den after cy frens came over and find us.. den later in e nite i & sally went fisherman to drink.. can tell she is trouble abt something.. den we took train back to PR.. haha.. in e train is where we countdown our 2006 christmas.. haha.. soo fun.. & funny den after went blue hut .. order beer and food.. have a long chat.. since we havnt really been catching up.. den later winnie & star came to join us... we stay till 2 plus den went home..

as for 2day.. stay @ home and rest.. havnt been sleeping well.... and lately been raining like hell.. so stay in-door...

2006-12-22T01:45:00.000+08:00

tdy.. went out with andy, marcus and sham.. went shopping and den went to ridwan house... den after tat went to meet chris.. bt den wehn i reach PR.. he sae he need to rush for a meeting last min n meet mi after tat.. so went to tamp meet sally.. have long john silver for dinner and walk e pasamalam.. bought some things... den saw SIS.. was dame piss of with her.. she made mi took off e branded watch in front of my n her frens.. she jus don wan me to wear as i wil spoilt it.. i was nt tat angry bt den sad as y she treat mi like tis.. as her own sis she can be like tis.. when she coming back to sg.. nev have any excitment.. cos gt her anot doesnt make a diff...jus like my family too...

i used to live in my own world... i cant be bother with anything... give up everything.. dono wat else to do... dame tired... sick of everything... as for dear.. i dono shld i carry on when he is back.. suddenly i jus feel like being alone... dono y... i admit i admire alot of ppl.. bt den i don wish to hurt anyone.. i rather hurt myself... ........... .......... .......... ........... ............... ............. ...................

2006-12-21T01:32:00.000+08:00

hellloo..long time nev update liao.. been busy working and going out wit my working frens.. have alot of fun with them and all e stupid action they did to others.. haha.. have been to orchard, marina square and vivo city with them.. havnt have a gd time relazing and enjoying myself.. oh ya.. lately alot of ting seems to happen.. haha.. mayb is fated or wat lah...

tat day @ MS.. so qiao @ billybombers buying ice-cream.. saw tiansong working there.. have a chat and catch tings up wit him.. get to noe alot of ting have happen n also he is married wit that ger.. haha.. @ last he tell mi e truth... well well.. gd for him and hope he settle his case asap.. hmmm also chat with ediwn in MSN.. he also change alot.. he tht tat i hate him alot and dare not me contact all tis years. bt den wats e pt.. everything is in e past.. nw he has a gd gf.. hope he treasure her.. den saw my 1st ex.. chat for awhile and also find out tat he has nt divorce.. cos his wife don wan... he lie to mi... nearly went back wit him when he sae he was divorce... bt den everything is over liao.. jus hope he lead his life n don bother mi ever.. wat else.. i also saw one of my ex who is 10years older den mi.. haha. he is nw married with 2 kids. gd 4 him.. and we jus chat 4 ahwile den i went off.. it seems tat i get to see so many ppl after lost contact for so years.. bt y cant i see GW.. sometimes i wonder isit fated or he really went back to japan...

i really hope to see him again.. even tht e ans is negative which i knew ... i jus wan to noe he is doing fine.. @ least i give up happily.. as for Chris.. lately i also dono y i feel very werid towards him.. ever since i noe he n his gf argue and tat day @ orchard saw them... i gt very funny feeling.. i dono isit i stil gt feeling for him and when i see him not happy i don feel gd.. i jus hope he can be like last time.. always giving a lame look and always looking happy.. even tht i cant be by his side nw & 4ever.. bt i will give him moral support and be there for him anytime.

2006-12-18T03:30:00.000+08:00

1st row> @ barcode 2nd row>took during shopping 3rd row> b4 going shopping
thur>been busy wit work since e last paper of e term-test.. went out wit classmates after thur paper.. went shopping... den after tat went to boat quay..(barcode).. vernice is working there.. haiz to my surprise i saw someone which i dono shld i hate or love.. when i open e door.. i saw ERIC.. was dame shock lah.. after sooo many years has pass, don expct to see him again.. den i tok to him for awhile.. b4 joining e rest @ e table.. dono y jus feel very werid lor.. haha.. suddenly.. i jus recall our past.. well... well... is e past liao... e whole pub was only us lah. cos is only 8plus.. we order chivas and start e singing competition bet hao n lisa.. haha.. e rest of us.. busy playing cards game and pool.. den later vernice came to work.. catch up wit her as i long time nev see her liao.. later slowly more n more ppl came in.. n later her e other boss came in(tony).. so qiao lor.. i also noe him lah..is also been years lor.. i noe him since i was 12years old.. haha. used to hang out bt later all lost contact.. y in e world after sooo many years i stil gt chance to see them again.. b y i cant get to see GW again. he also MIA soo long liao.. y it turn out like tis...

fri> went back to work @ last.. dame happy lah.. can see all e monkeys there.. haha.. den after work went to eat supper with macus, andy and riduan.. den took cab home.. n zzz

sat> early morn went to work.. dame tired sia.. didnt sleep @ all lah.. den @ work i also took a nap awhile. den is time to go home liao... time pass very fast.. after work went K-box(parklane) with anydy and cy.. was quite fun and sing sing all e way.. tat tis waiter e service was very good. bt den is a MIC.. den later we order hot drinks.. tis waitress dame fucking att lah.. shouted her repeat order @ us.. andy was dame piss off lah. later go complaint to e manager in charge... den they apologise to us.. after tat.. 8plus went home lor.. all e way went to meet sally, cheng yi, michelle and alfred.. den after tat i went to meet my ex lah.. haiz.. den chris call mi. bt den i didnt pick up lor.. den went home to zzz

sun> as ususal went to church and den to work.. haha.. really have alot of fun and laughter @ work. really miss them alot... den after work.. e whole gang of us went for supper... den chat awhile den go home lah... oh ya.. my sis is coming back on tue... yuppie.. so happy to see her again.. time pass real fast.. 1 year liao. n she is back..and waiting for all my nice nice clothing.. haha.. thanks sis... m

2006-12-12T15:53:00.000+08:00

havnt been updating cos exam period.. busy studying n play hard.. keke.. hmm nth much to update.. jus tat over the week was preparing for exam.. met up with sally cy and chris over e wk end.. i tink chris had an argument with his gf.. when his gf call.. n e expression from his face can tell.. he didint tok much.. bt can tell his mood swing abit.. bt i try to tok alot of lame and crappy things to make him laugh and change his mood.. i may not be able to help him in anything bt at least can make him smile.. jus don feel gd when i see him put on a sour face... haha i also dono y i feel tat way sia... mayb i cant be wit him anymore so hope to see him live happily bah.. (",)

hmm 2paper has gone.. didnt do well for A&P.. last min den finish up e 1st ques bt also didnt write much... was a bit down lor.. and also due to my eyes tat over e wk didnt really study.. my eyes gt prob again.. dono isit last time e accident.. haiz.. tdy..store mgt was quite ok.. aiming for an A bt dono can anot..keke..

nth much to update.. jus hope everything will fine... and cont to work hard for 2 more papers.. keke.. as for jereko.. he has call mi once bt didnt tok much.. hope he enjoying himself there and faster come back.. lol...

2006-12-08T12:39:00.000+08:00

Morn.. mOrn.. have not been sleeping well tis 2 days.. haiz.. it seems there are probs all over sia.. oh ya.. wed.. was teck birthday.. we went to pasir ris park to have steamboat.. although the place is abit deserted bt den we do enjoy there.. the foods.. drinks.. most impt is the gathering.. have lots of jokes.. fun .. laughter.. and our dear teck 4ever nt full de lor.. haha.. was a nice gathering and soon i left early to go meet boy.. haiz... we had a big fight at home.. he started his ridicious statement by saying y i always meet my ex... and den we started arguing abt ex's... i told him cos he has been lying to mi and i have been quiet for a period of time.. when i confronted him.. he stil cont to lie to mi... tats something i really cant understand.. tats y i still seeing my ex. Argument was cont til.. he started to raise voice and throw things... i was dame scare lah.. n all !#@#@#@ words come out til i left the house... he keep calling mi n mesing mi bt i jus ignore... jus find it so stupid to argue wit him... den @ last i reach home.. he keep calling and end up toking to mi nicely.. bt den his temper arose again... i was too tired and sian to aruge back so kept quiet... til i fall alsleep..haha...

den yest morn... he mes mi n sae i win liao lah.. fall asleep also nev sae.. he was dame angry..lol.. we didnt contact e whole day til late evening.. he sms mi and sae.. tdy i no nd to send him off to e airport.. he wan to take tis period of time to tink over abt e prob we have and come up wit an ans when he is back.. as for mi.. i have a negative feeling lor.. bt den it is not my 1st time such ting happen to mi.. i am used to liao... even he decide to break.. i'm fine with it.. wat can i do?? i don force ppl to stay... in e nite.. he sms mi sae he going drink wit frens.. (let him be lor)... den later his fren call mi n sae he was drunk as he keep drinking non-stop.. and ask mi whether i shld come down n see him.. i tink over long and make my way down.. alex send us home.. den i put him to bed lor... e worst part is he keep vomiting and i have to clean him up... yucks!!! aRgh!!!

people always sae drunken ppl will tok the truth that kept in their heart.. i believe in tat... n he really did say something lah.. he keep saying tat y he treat mi soo gd.. give mi freedom.. bt y i like to compare him wit my ex and GW.. he always keep quite bt deep inside was nt happy... (for normal ppl, mostly all very touch.. bt i felt nth) does it mean tat i don love him?? Is not lor.. maybe i didnt give him a chance to stand in my heart.. cos he is sitll nt e one i wan or can replace GW in my heart.. he is a gd catch and i trying to open my heart bt den.. i also dono...

boy boy.. is leaving tdy to japan and korean.. is 3 weeks only bt it seems like i going to miss him.. e other time he went HK i stil ok lor.. haha.. bt for sure he wont leave mi.. cos tis morn we have clear tings up.. i told him wat he sae yest.. and he was soo pai seh lah.. haha.. he also felt bad tat he yest was so drunk... well... i really hope time can prove alot of things lor...

meantime.. nw is exam time.. sian ant term sem is coming... hope i faster finish my studies and out to the working world soon... k lah.. gt to study b4 sending him off... update when free.... hehe

Check out my Christmas Wish: http://www.mtvasia.com/Funstuff/Xmas/xmas.php

2006-12-05T19:48:00.000+08:00

A NEW FAMILY

GUESS WHO ARE THEY?? & DOING WHAT IN GUYS TOILET

AFTER FOOD .. HAVE A NAP

WATI NEW ROOM & TOILET

tdy after A&P lect... gt 3hrs break.. so we deicided to go IKEA to have lunch... zaki also join us..lol.. yummy yummy.. e food not bad lor.. bt e place was dame packed lah.. early morn ard 1115am.. e Q was dame long sia... after makan we went shop shop n took many pics..

after shop shop @ IKEA.. we took cab back to sch for presentation.. e.one seems to be nervous bt den in e end e.ting was ok ok.. we also took many many pics again.. tdy is our mood for pics.. lol...

2006-12-04T19:29:00.000+08:00

tdy @ sch was dame boring.. as thought don have sch lah.. come for 20 min lect.. n read all e rubbish of dono wat FM to study.. den went for stupid tut.. sit there n chat.. den waited for someone to consult proj.. waited for 2hrs plus bt see us for 5mins.. always like tat de lor.. wasting ppl time.. so angry lah... bt in between waiting.. we took pics.. lol... after consult..

i & wati went shopping.. i finally bought my shoe.. which i quite like lor.. cost me $29.90.. bt worth it.. haha.. hmm@ nite meet boy awhile.. see him eat den chat awhile den went home lor.. dono y i gt a bad feeling lor... it seems tat we suddenly gt nth to tok.. all is abt his work n frens n his coming trip to korean and japan... haiz.. he is leaving mi alone in sg during Christmas and New Year.. all alone by myself... all frens are occupied with family and partners gathering.. haiz.. mayb i shld go work.. can earn $$ and have fun @ e same time.. lol... haiz...

2006-12-03T22:02:00.000+08:00

Long time nev blog liao.. been busy wit sch n work lor.. haha.. well thur having HTM presentation lor.. everyone don seem to be prepare and last min self-practice.. lol.. bt overall, i felt tat our gp did quite ok compare to e rest of the gp..lol... after presentation..we all like siao lang.. keeping taking pics here n there..lol...

over e wk end.. only work on fri... during work i really felt relax and having lots of fun lor... well.. stay back to work OT, den after tat went to eat supper wit my frens den went home.. was dame tired liao.. don feel like going anywhere else.. cos is ard 3plus am... haha...

sat...woke up ard 12 plus.. tats a very long time i last woke up tat late sia..lol.. den faster wash up.. went to meet my dearest 68 and her sis.. 2gather wit their babies.. walk ard orchard.. which i last went was in June.. lol... really miss those times when they are single.. we can happliy walk here n there.. go anywhere we like.. bt nw with their kids.. is like NO NO.. we must follow e small ones... haha.. btw.. i also saw many of my frens who i long time nev catch up with liao... like.. karen.. veron.. si na.. alex.. wei jun... n e worst is i tht i saw TIANSONG... bt end up is his tiwn brother TIAN KAI.. wat a disappointment sia... haiz.. always tat was him end up is e brother.. sian onez... after tat went to meet my boy.. he bought mi a 3/4 pants.. lol.. lucky it fits me sia.. or else he will get it from me..lol.. bt den in e end we went seperate ways cos we quralle lor.. haha. he went clubbing his own.. i went drinking wit judy.. haiz... bt den also gd lor.. long time nev spent time wit my own frens liao.. suddenly felt so relaxz.. haha.. my drinking level also went down liao.. last time don get high easily bt nw it seems quite fast sia... old liao mah.. so heart also old liao.. cant take too much alchol..

2006-11-28T23:40:00.000+08:00

Fri>> nO sCh.. nO wOrK.. so ShoIk sIa.. haha... sO decided to go n cut my hair... was soo tired of my hairstyle... lol.. tink gt dono hw many months nev cut liao... sOoo went tO do SOmething abt my hair... e pic above is my new hairstlye... lol... hmmm at nite went to boy fren house... some watch VCD.. some play lajong... some play cards.. e rest jus sit there and do nth.. lol... nth much... to cont..

tdy aS usual go sch.. slack here n there den went home... @ nite meet chris.. company him go cut hair.. den went for dinner... hmmm felt tat we are really like gt nth to tok liao... miss last time we used to be talktive.. haiz... after tat he send mi hm... tats all......

2006-11-24T17:19:00.000+08:00

Yan Baby gEr

Uenice baby boy n baby ger

Daniel baby boy

Time passed very fast.. eveyone has go seperate ways... i notice that most of my frens are really married & some have kids liao.. all my dearest kakis who used to go clubbing with mi.. or have known for nearly 10 years are ALL MARRIED.. accept mi lah.. haha.. hmmm sometimes do envy them wit loving hubby/wife and their kids.. bt on the other hand.. i stil prefer my FREEDOM.. i stil have my wish to fulfil.. and mayb i havnt met e right guy... is stil earlier bah... haha.. well.. i wan to THank you guys who have been with mi all tis years... even we nw grow up in a different land.. bt we are stil e BEST FRENS & FRENS 4EVER.. i really missed u all badly... & also love u all deep deep....
these are e ppl who have been thru wit mi e past 10yrs. thanks alot..
gals:( Uenice, yan, sally, judy, shi, liwen, wanping, vernice, xinyi, sharon, christine, may, abi, cai yun, joleene, veron, veronica, dao sao, jesslyn,peiyu,juliet,lena,stephanie, jie, kelly, qin, ke wei)

guys:( tiansong, wenkang, darryl, andrew, chris, quan er,andrew tong,
andy-kor,daniel-kor,dennis,shao ji, shao ming,edmund, edward, gary,
GUO WEI,ivan-didi,jack,james,jason,micheal-kor,raymond,sean,tyson,
& my hotels fren..-too many to list)

2006-11-22T22:04:00.000+08:00

haiz... updating again.. well nth much also.. been busy wit sch proj...proj..proj.. sian sia.. haiz.. n also meeting up wit my frens.. really miss them very much... nw everyone is busy no time to really meet up..

have tht very hard, wonder shld i cont wit him ant.. has been staying @ his home for e past days liao... hmmm have started communicating well.. he has been a gd boy.. come home after work & do cook dinner for mi.. haha.. company mi play games... company mi watch tv... company mi do revision.. company mi eat.. chat wit mi... tell mi bed-time story.. pat mi to zzz.. wake mi up to sch... hmmm bt is that e LIFE i wan??? it seems sweet bt den its like daily routine.. i dono y... he seems to be in my eye bt nt in my HEART.. no matter hw hard he try to put in... i still havnt accept...

wanted to end...
but dono how to...
scare of hurting...
scare of regret...
scare of losing....
HAIZ....... time will prove e.ting.....

2006-11-19T23:47:00.000+08:00

Has beEn Very bUsy LateLy sO nO tIme tO uP daTe... Hmm haVe a "SuRpRiSe" WeeKeNd... ovEr e wK wAs busy wOrkiNg bt aFtEr wOrk MaNaGe tO meEt uP wIt sOme fREns & aLsO my bOy..

e oThEr daY i CaUgHt mY ah bOy LiE tO mE.. hIs tRip tO maLaYsIa wAs cAnceL bT hE stiL sAe hE iS gOiNg.. cOs oF tAt i wAs nT haPpy n i aLsO LiE tO hIm. i sAe i gOiNg dRinKing wIt mY gf's.. (bT iT wAs mY eX)haIz.. (i aLwAys beLieVe iF u eVeR Lie Or dO sOmethIng wRonG u sUre to get cAtch) sUrpRiSe tO sEe mY bF & hIs fReN @ e sAmE pLaCe.. hE LoOk shoCk & pUt mI aWay.

He: How come you with a guy & nt ur gf's?
Me: Den how come you in Sg & nt Malaysia?
He: Last minute cancel de so they went drinking instead.
Me: Oh!! Last min CANCEL.. den my gf's also last min cant meet mi.. so my guy fren ask mi out mah.
He:Who is that guy?
Me: why you bother so much? I & him is only frens mah.
He: (don believe) and keep asking...
Me:(angry liao) STOP ASKING.. i hate ppl to lie to me.. jus go ur way & i go my way..
DEPART
He: (walk over) Hi.. care to join us together?
Me:(diao..diao..) Stare at my ex..
Ex: Anything lor.. i'm fine with it.
END UP JOIN TBL...& both of them start to talk....

i was very angry because he lie to mi... n i felt tat he lie to mi cos tat BITCH is coming to meet them lor... e next day i confronted him & he stil lie to mi.. den i sae suai le.. fr now onwards i cant be bother wit him & don wish to noe anything abt him... In e end he felt guity & told mi e truth... i was NOT SAD.. NOT ANGRY.. but DISAPPOINTED...

2006-11-13T01:06:00.000+08:00

havnt been updating anything cos was dame sick n busy with sch n work .... gt a bad wk.... cos of sick... hmmmm recall wats happening...

wed> i posted abit but cont fr here... after sch went to boy house and his mom came over n cook for us... his mom cooking was great had alot of food bt 3 of us eat.. lol.. den slightly later i started to be more ill... down wit e stupid FLU and went to zzz awhile & later did i knew his mom boil chinese med for mi and my boy fed mi when i woke up... and later in e nite i was running high fever... n didnt slpe well... he was soo poor thing... he woke up every 2hrs to check my temp and take ice+water to cool my fever... so tat next day i am able to go sch.. he was sooo sweet.... & end up he fall sick...lol....

thur> was stil dame sick by e FLU bt fever went down alittle... manage to struggle thru out 9am to 4pm lesson... after went to west mall to check out the merchandise and had dinner @ jurong point... which judy & didi came to join me n wati... We had a great catching up wit one ant.. n end up @ coffee-bean chatting til 10plus den went home....have to thank my buddy for company all e way to west mall.. shes e greatest...

fri> woke early in morn bt stil dame sick til i cant go work.. sooo sad lah... oh ya.. e stupid CRM L..E...C....T... didnt open e link @ 11am lah.. wait all of us wait till 1130am and e news came ard sae her system down.. give her sometime to fix.. end up 1230pm she sae send e ans to her email.. WTF!!!! wonder she know how to log in early n check e system ant.. was sooooo sick n made mi wake up early for nth.... was dame piss...den @ nite went to meet boy... he was slightly beta liao... haha..

sat> was busy working fr 7am all e way till 2am... was dame tired lah.. cum i jus recover fr my sickness.... hmmm went home after having supper wit my working frens....

sun> which is tdy... hmmm was stil sick with bad cough.... haiz... didnt went anyway... was sleeping e whole noon til 7plus went for dinner wit boy and later meet chris for kopi... as usual up-date latest thing.... hmmm jus felt we becoming more like pure frens... haha.. mayb tats e best way bah....

as for boy... i stil don feel stable wit him... nth wrong wit him... bt dono y he jus cant be in my heart.. i noe he did alot for mi.. n he really treasure mi after soo many ting happen... bt den i jus feeling pressure... i still confuse... i stil have doubt... i felt lost... & i hope i can see the ans soon... give mi some time....

2006-11-08T20:03:00.000+08:00

~Went to for LECT/MEETING/TUTORIAL~
~After school meet boy boy~
~Went shop awhile and he bought me a slipper cos mine tore off~
~Went home and his mom cook for us~
~Yummy!! Is so nice and got my fav~
~ His mom stay awhile after dinner and left~
~His mom seem to be social with me~
~ Hope everything is fine~
~ Haiz... Time for SUPERSTAR show now~

LOve BOy boy dEep dEep......

2006-11-08T00:13:00.000+08:00

~~~BORING~~~
~~~STRESS~~~
~~~PROJECTS~~~
~~~WORK~~~~
~~~PROMISES~~~ I HAVE TO KEEP E PROMISE I HAVE IN HIM... ISIT FATED TO BE LIKE THIS??????
~~~~TIRED~~~~
~~~SURPRISE~~~ NOTICE SOME OF MY SEC FRENS ARE MARRIED LAST YEAR... Y EVERY ONE IS MARRIED WIT A GD FAMILY.. BT Y NT ME????
~~~SORROW~~~
~~~SADNESS~~~
~~~UN-HAPPINESS~~~
~~~HURTFUL~~~
~~~PAINFUL~~~
~~SOON EVERYTHING WILL GONE.... GONE WITH THE WIND AS HIGH UP INTO THE SKY~~

2006-11-07T01:43:00.000+08:00

lately been busy with sch n work... soo long havnt up-date... hmmm well over e wk end was busy working bt enjoy myself... i really miss work cos i always have all e fun there n always looking forward to go in e wk end.. hmmm wasnt be able to meet boy boy tat much.. as lots of sch stuffs coming up.. bt somehw manage to see cos temp @ his place lor... after wat had happen i tink i learn to treasure him liao..lol.... bt den somehw i hope time can prove e.ting lor... cos sometimes i do miss gw alot.... jus dono y sia.... cos mayb he really have nt been out of my life bah.... oh ya.. met chris on sat.. & he told mi a secret which i dono shld i be shock ant lah... he went to a place n then he experience something he nev have b4.. haha.. he seems to be excited over it bt den i tink he also don feel gd after tat...lol... hmm sch start again tdy.. was dame tired lah... bt struggle to 4pm den went home... zzzz.. den @ nite meet boy boy lor... dono y felt sian bt when see him... sooo happy..lol..... thanks dear... i wil try to fall for u deep...lol.... (see how lah) k lah.. time to zzzz haiz.. tml 9AM LECT AGAIN..............

2006-11-02T02:19:00.000+08:00

Celebrated Angeline 18th birthday, plan to sentosa and have a great fun.. jus like we used to have.. all e silly n stupid games but den it was funny & everyone had a great time.. after went to vivo city bt there wasnt much place we can eat... so walk ard and went to park mall... have our sushi.. we spilt into 2tbls... our tbl e guys(teck & boss) are great eater lah.. watever we gers cant finish they will eat... n dono hw many rds of tofu in e beginning...haha.. n lastly e birthday cake (orea cheese cake) it was nice lah... after tat cont to chat n take pic... & time to depart and go home.. zzzz below are some pic we took.

setting off

pics in the water

groups for the gamesmichelle/jj/teck/boon

before going to bath

birthday celebration

2006-10-31T23:21:00.000+08:00

haiz.... tdy was nt really a gd day for mi lor... haiz.... tis morn boy call mi and told mi he view my frenster cos soooo happen his collegue was viewing my profile cos he is my fren (marcus).. den he saw all e pic and was nt happy abt it cos i stil left gw pic inside... den we argue abt it lor... bt i didnt explain much cos i dono wat else to sae.. lol... den went to sch ard 3plus for comm skills.. wow kao dono WTH e teacher toking abt lor... doing those stupid online discussion... haiz.. after lesson went home lor... den actually gt meet boy de bt den something happen tat make my mood low moral....

qiwei mother call mi n told mi he left a sum of money for mi.. n e bank wan mi to go n clarify myself... e sum of $$ is a huge amt lor... which i was dame shock lah.... den his mom also told mi tat he left a letter for mi.... after putting down e phone.. i had a bad feeling tat his death is not accident bt is plan out well.. or else y gt $$ n letter for mi... dono y i jus burst into tears n told alex abt it.... he also shock lor.. tat qiwei gt extra saving... haha.. i really dare nt read e letter cos i scare i noe e truth n i cant take it....

actually i really very sad cos we have been very closed fren for sooo long and somehw he was attracted to mi.. bt we nev be 2gather b4 cos we draw a line tat we are pure frens... as his close fren and see him passed away ... i really cannot take it.... oh ya.. alex told mi tat bitch went to report police abt e incident... haha.. bt dono wats going onz... bt they promise mi that they wont let mi get involove cos nt my prob... i hope e.ting will turn out well...

as for mi n boy... e.ting has been settle... i told him i will give him ant chance... mayb becos i need someone to hear my sorrows bah.... i have no one to turn to liao.... alot of things has happen recently... i really cannot take it or breath.... i scare i will go into depression again..... its quite scary....
e heart beat stops ~^^~~~^^^~~~~~^^^^~~~~~~~^^^^~~~~~~^^^........................

2006-10-30T19:18:00.000+08:00

yest after work wanted to meet chris bt den after tat nev lor.. den boy boy call mi n sae wan to meet.. den went over his fren house watch vcd den end up went over to boy house play majong.. we had a big arugement cos i wanted to end tis r.s.. he ask mi y??? i sae i tired of being trapped in a r.s cos of his long term r.s wit his ex.. she has been calling n mesing him like siao n he jus ignore it lor.. i told him tis case doesnt settle things wont work out well... den he sae he had told her don bother to contact him cos they are impossible anymore.. n he have mi now.. bt den if she cont like tis.. i don feel gd lor... we end up shouting n screaming lah.. den he don let mi home sia.. WTH lah...

in e end he ask for ant chance... he sae he need time to settle e.ting wit her.. bt can i trust him??? they been 2gather for 4 yrs n nearly get marry leh... haha... y such tings always happen to mi sia... haiz.. i reliaze he beoming more like gw bt i noe he 4ever cant replace gw in my heart...

tink he began to like mi alot.. cos of his every little things he do for mi... 1st he has stopped speeding on e road.. stop going for race in malaysia.... 2nd he rented a flat near my area where he gt a nice house to stay.. 3rd he went to buy e cute pillow i wanted to put in his car.. 4th he brought mi to new asia bar e other day.. which is a place i like very much.. 5th he bought mi a diamond ring which i rejected... 6th he make e effort to send mi home after work lately.. 7th he stop going clubbing lately too... all tis happen when i start to treat him very cold... within 2 wks he change his ways.... all becos of mi.... to a normal ger is touch...bt to mi... is orh...so....!!! haha...

really dono shld i cont or not... very sian & tired... soo many ting happen... tired @ work... tired in him... tired abt sch.. stress on sch fee... stress in family...stress in frens.. n sad over many incident... life have nev really be gd for mi tis past yrs.... wat shld i do?????????????????

2006-10-29T04:00:00.000+08:00

up-date news.. tdy jul have a nice time @ her workplace.. manage to see someone @ her workplace.. & also sabo all her managers wit her spicy sweets.. one of her manager thomas cant take hot stufff spilt out e sweets and !@#$%^&*() at her.. n later onz eric also !@#$%^&* at her bt den enjoy e it very much... jul... y u like tat.. make ppl suffer... haha... during function gt not enough staff.. so o.one have to suffer alittle.. bt end up it was a gd ending after all e hard work. den after work jul went to meet her ex lor... went to la kopi til 3 plus am den he send her home... jul felt tat they seem like strangers liao.. e kind of feeling is very werid... and she don seem to noe him any beta anymore... haiz...............well... mayb tis is call fate bah... anyway below are some pic taken during work...do enjoy..........lolz

2006-10-27T00:51:00.000+08:00

WE HAVE A FATE TO MEET EACH OTHER

START OFF AS FRIENDS & SOON BECOME COUPLES

YOU ENTER MY LIFE & GAVE MI HOPE AGAIN

DAYS GOES WELL AND HAPPY MOMENTS ARRIVED

BUT SOON SAD MOMENTS APPEARE

YOU START TO AVOID AS THT NTHING HAVE HAPPEN

YOU RAN AWAY & LEFT MI TO BE ALONE

YOU HURT MY HEART BY DOING THIS...

YOU LET MI FELT UNSTABLE & THINK ALOT..

YOU CAME BACK AGAIN BT DEN U GOT NO ANS..

YOU EXPECT MI TO READ UR MIND?????

IN THE END WHEN COLD WAR STARTED.. YOU START TO "GAN CHEONG"

U THINK A PERIOD TO TINK ABT IT N CONCLUDE TO ASK FOR ANT CHANCE..

DO YOU THINK IS FAIR??? DO YOU KNOW THE HURT BEGINS??

IN CONCLUDE: IF U TREASURE SOMEONE U LIKE, DON EVER CHEAT OR DON TRUST E OPP PARTY.. IF U LIKE E PERSON, U SHLD TRUST N RESPECT THEM.. & SOLVE ANY PROB OCCURED 2GATHER.. ONCE E CHANCE IS GONE THERE WILL NT BE ANT CHANCE.. WHAT IF U ARE GIVEN A 2ND CHANCE.. WILL HISTORY REPEAT??? ANS: YES...

SHLD I GIVE U ANT CHANCE???? ASK URSELF.... ANS WILL APPEARE TO YOU SOON................................... :p

2006-10-26T01:02:00.000+08:00

yest had a gd n bad time... went to work as usual & gt make fun by my managers cum chef.. all bully mi sia.. lolz.. bt they are always like tat..im used too liao..hmm stay back OT and help out lor.. den reach home ard 12plus.. den went down to qiwei wake.. i was dame sad til i cried very badly lor.. i really cant believe he really gone.. we waited for his "gf" to come and confronted her wat happen to them... b4 she came.. someone told us tat bitch has an affair wit ant guy in her workplace & maybe qiwei noe abt it & cant take it tats y he end his life..

when tat bitch arrived.. i walked up n ask her wat did she do?? she told us his death has nothing to do wit her.. we forced her like siao den she started toking.. @ 1st she sae they had a big fight n she wanted to break up den she walk away.. den e next day she knew he is dead.. stil can tok rubbish... den we cont to force her sae cos we noe tats nt e truth... in e end she admited she had ant guy n wanted to broke off wit qiwei.. bt den they had a big fight den qiwei threathen to kill her.. bt end up nev... dono real ant lor... den came a flying chair(dono fr where sia)... den e bitch shouted wat we want.. (here come e fun part:) one of us shouted we want to beat u... bt don wan dirty our hands(use weapon) den she shouted:wan to fight come one to one lah.. don tink u are guy i scare leh.. den all e guys gfs all stand up and alex gf shouted to tat bitch: u very gd in fighting isit.. u & i one to one.. if u (bitch) lost u have to take everyone blow.. if i (alex gf) lost.. everything is settle..

she(bitch) veryy confidience she will win sia.. end up she lost.. n gt beaten by us lor...e last kick i gave her real hard to her (mei mei) den later gt police come.. bt den e.one act blur lor... nth happen n they left.. til nw i stil nt happy over it lor.. anyway we told her parents tis matter wont rest so easily.. her mom asked us hw much we want.. she can give qiwei family e.month $3500 til their children get married.. wat a joke.. tink $$$ can buy e.ting.. not a LIFE.. dono wat else to sae liao.. stil very sad over it..

btw.. tdy sales also nt very gd lor.. sian .. haiz.. want to get rid of e stocks soon bt den it seems not moving... k lah.. zzzz time... cont...

2006-10-23T23:16:00.000+08:00

where have u been??? its been a long long time since i last heard abt u... suddenly i jus tht of u... its been 2yrs tat i last saw u... i tried my very best to get u out of my life bt somehw i cant do tat... cos deep down in my heart u always there... i dono wat to do??? how to cont?? how to survive?? how to let go?? how to accept?? is painful to have question mark all over my head...is hurtful that i cant find u.... is stressful to tink where are u???

when i chose to be wit Cxxxx, i have tried to put u aside liao...i was happy to be wit him and tht he might slowly push u aside bt den things jus happen & til nw i also dono y i n him end up... ???? after tat i wasnt living very gd... bt i manage to pick myself up n cont my path... bt i noe no matter wat happen GW always lives in mi... really felt very terrible...

jus now i heard a song which u sang to mi b4... all of a sudden memories of us jus flash across my mind... it was sooo sweet to recall bt it vanish in a split second... e shadow of u has slwoly disappearing away bt whether is it a gd thing, i dono.... i really hope to see u again... whether we can be 2gather again.. it doesnt matter anymore... i hope u stil in sg instead of japan... cos if u chose to stay there, e chance is 0%... i really hope to see u again.... have alot of things to tell u.....

anyway i will always rem e times we had 2gather n e little surprise u gave mi... thanks alot..... really miss u alot..........................

2006-10-23T22:50:00.000+08:00

tdy went to sch... dame sian sia.. 1st lect tok abt proj liao..lolzz.. end early lor.. den went for lunch.. after tat went 2 open push cart... e crowd nt bad.... thanks to xue brother fren who bought $$48... so e sales stil nt too bad.. bt e necklaces like nt really moving sia... hope next few days will be beta.. lolz... closed shop ard 4plus lor.. den after went to meet chris for dinner... n later sally n cy join us... sit there drink n tok tok til 9plus den boy boy came to look for mi.. bt didnt tok much.. he watch tv while i serving e net.. lolz...

our push cart=accessories & candies

2006-10-22T20:57:00.000+08:00

been working n working non-stop.. have been able to have a gd slep or even have fun.. bt den back @ work i have alot of fun wit my managers & friends.. they really cheer mi up n made mi happy when i in e BAD mood.. lol.. they are really fun... last fri... after work all of us went out for supper @ lao pa sa.. haha only 2gers n 10 guys sia.. for e 1st time i felt so fun sia... we ate alot.. fr satay to chinese food... den we went to baby face.. some of us didnt went as they are under age.. lol... so went to sea-side to sit down n chat lor.. til 4 am den went home.. was dame tired lah.... den slep til 12 pm den woke up... haha..

my good working frens always wit mi...

yest i heard from cleo that my best buddy qiwei is dead liao.. he had taken something and jump down fr his flat.. i tink becos of his gf bah.. i havnt really tok to cleo abt it.. bt i was dame sad lor.. cos e last time i saw him in sep, he was stil ok... bt den one mth later he is gone... tue i be going to his furnel although i am not allow.. cos cleo n gang scare i cant take it.. he was e next close person to mi after kor kor.. i hope he death is nt becos of gf... or else i wont let e matter rest.. his gf is a f bitch... til now i cant believe he is gone... totally lost.... he was a nice person bt y must he end up like tis....

haiz.. sch opening tis coming mon.. wat a boring time sia.... n worst is my timetable is so fuck lah... e.day start sch early n end late.. n worst is in bet gt 4hrs break... WTF lah.... dono wat to do sia... haiz.. y y y y y is mine???? hmmm i going to miss work esp e ppl there... bt e.one also starting sch.. haha... nvm.. wk end stil can see them...

as for my ah boy.... i also dono how... jus been cold to him ever since he came back fr HK... haiz.. see how bah... let time prove e.ting bah.. k lah.. time to go out... haha.. meeting Cxxxx.. update again..

2006-10-18T22:49:00.000+08:00

This is my working place.. took some pic to rem as mayb i will leave tis place soon.. miss e place.. e ppl.. e fun... e laughter... & also e sadness....

this is e signage put up by e mgt.. quite shock to see on my 1st day bt den quite funny after reading it.. tis is to remind some idiot who always like to work in their style n create trouble to others to do dbl job..lol

2006-10-17T23:34:00.000+08:00

felt so trouble by so many things... i might nt be able to study if my appeal is nt approve... have to wait for 2wks time den i noe.. i don wish 2 give up half way bt den if theres no option wat to do.. haiz.. have to come out to work liao lor.. having alot of prob bt den life stil have to move onz.. sometimes i wonder y always mi sia.. e.one can stil rely on someone bt i seem to always rely on myself... felt very stressful... & i nev have a proper r.s... i start to like my boy bt den things always happen n pull every r.s apart in e end... felt so tired n sian liao... really gt no comments n cant tink of anything anymore... leave e.ting n let it be bah... ......... ............. ................ .......... ....

2006-10-16T23:16:00.000+08:00

been busy working lately non-stop haiz.. tink almost 16hrs a day bah... i also dono y i wan to tired myself... haha.. have nt been really meeting boy boy lor.. bt tink he has also abit nt happy liao...haiz.. worst is e other day i wit him den saw my 1st ex.. so qiao he n my bf is childhood fren sia.. WTF lah.. after i left to meet my fren he went to tell alot abt mi to my bf.. my bf did confront mi n ask mi isit wat he sae is true.. i admited lor.. n i told him is all in e past liao.. nw is e present n i have change alot liao.. if he mind den break lor... is ok wit mi cos tis is not e 1st time i have such r.s... after some tht he sae he will accept wat i am now..

i was dame angry den i scolded my ex.. n told him i wont wan to see him or contact him anymore lor... later he admited tat he purposly sae de cos he nt happy i wit my bf.. WTH lah.. den e day b4 boy went HK, we aruge again abt meeting up early n send him to airport.. i manage to knock off early 2 company him.. bt didnt tok much tat day as he busy entertaining his frens... when he left he didnt sae anything accept he will miss mi...lol... he went a few days & suppose 2 come back by sun bt den his hp tone is stil overseas so i didnt bother much... tue i gt him bt he nev pick n nev reply to mi til nw... i also dono wat happen jus had a bad feeling tat we wil end... e.ting seems so fast...

hmmm over e wk end went baby face wit liwen, andy & joey.. hmmm it was ok ok lah.. mayb cos after quite tired liao..lol.. den sun met dao sao (jesslyn) & kor kor @ compass pt for lunch.. had saki sushi.. it was kor treat cos dao sao bd... had a lot & was dame full... den after went over to 68 home to stay.. as usual lor.. help her look after didi & play PS2 with her n her daughter.. had lots of fun.. den later martin came over & chat til 3plus den e.one went to zzz... next day nite den went home.. was dame tired lah.. haha

..

2006-10-02T00:57:00.000+08:00

yest didnt went to hilary bd cos chris didnt go lor.. haiz.. den end up after work meet sally , cy & frens go katong lor.. we went there play board-game..a nice n relax place.. gt all sort of games sia.. we started @ 8 plus til 1am den left sia.. was quite tired liao.. bt had alot of fun.. esp when we play payday... haha keep on sabo ppl pay $$$$ n robin keep on bully by us sia.. had a great time... den uncle came to fetch us home.. long time nev see him liao.. lol... hmmm den zzz liao lor...

2006-09-28T23:30:00.000+08:00

Yawns wake up early in e morn, haiz back to work @ last.. Chris send mi to workplace cos on e way mah cum my leg injure and stil in pain.. during our journey felt very werid cos we hardly tok @ all & kept quite a period of time. den he told mi he is moving house cos his parents divorce. haiz less chance to meet him liao.. :( we went for breakfast b4 we depart for work. dono y feeling very werid when heard tat news. after work meet boy for dinner and actually waiting for chris to finish work n meet for coffee bt was disappointed cos he nevt reply mi @ all.. gt no comments anymore.. cos is nt e 1st time...

2006-09-27T00:55:00.000+08:00

Soooooooo sian stay @ home e whole day playing games, sercing some website.. & chat over msn.. suddenly those ppl long time nev see mi online got 2 tok to mi..lol.. dame boring stay @ home cos i injure my dame leh lah... sian.. have to hope ard e hm whenever i wan to move..lol... werid tat i tht of my dear.. haha.. wondering wat time he log off... & finally ard 6plus he call mi n sae he @ my house downstair wan to take mi go makan.. den i sae hw to go out.. my leg cant move.. guess his respond???? i come up piggy-back u go down den we go eat lor...

e 1st ting in my mind was.. are u crazy i don wan to break ur back..lol... bt he really did tat lor... lol.. we went to kopitiam to have fish soup.. yum yum.. my fav.. den we chatted near my blk.. til i sae i tired wan to go home.. ok lah.. he is nice.. jus now i ask him to send mi his pic.. bt was take ike a yr ago lah.. bt is stil ok wit mi..lol... thanks dear

....

busY bUsY

2006-09-26T15:38:00.000+08:00

been busy working tis past few days.... non stop n didnt really sleep for 2 days.. cos went home bath rest awhile den back to work lor.. so tired.. yAwns... remind mi of my past life sia.. last time almost 1 wk nev go home sia..work 20 hrs and slep @ locker 2 hrs den go back work.. lol was quite pissed of on sat @ work cos of e 2 bitches- to be wife!! so dame e troublesome sia.. ask tis ask that... den end up give a LJ face... bt den sun couple was beta.. they were nice n i gt a small hongbao fr them.. keke... after work quite late liao.. went home slep 2hrs again.. den go work...

dono hw come unable to walk properly.. my leg dame fucking pain lah... its been like tat for few days liao.. dono wat happen sia... haiz... so pain tat i demanded to go see doc sia... i cant stand properly neither can walk too... so yest i went to see e doc.. gt a big bandage... n he told mi not to wallk tis few days.. ask mi rest for 1 wk n see how.. siao.. i told him i stil gt to work lor.. e most i can take 2 days off lor.. he sae NO NO... haiz.. i don care liao lah.. if my leg tat time stil cannot walk den see how lor...

now $$ is very de impt to mi lor... bt den i noe health is more impt.. lol.. haiz dono lah... oh ya... e other day.. jereko ask mi to be his gf... i keep tinking shld i ant.. cos i stil very confuse wit my feelings lor.. i dono shld i accept him or if i accept him.. wil he jus a replacement ant... he treat mi nt bad... bt guys to mi is tooo scary liao... n sian also... i tht it over very hard... since c.... gt gf liao n no matter hw hard i try, we wont patch tings up anymore liao.. y nt give jereko a chance... bt i told him tried n see how... if cant den be frens lor.. he agree to it.. bt it seems he is more happy den i am lor.. lol... bt he poor ting lor.. cos nw i busy working n don really have time for him bt he don mind,.. cos even if jus send mi home or meet for meal only.. he is contented.. so nw my lunch time.. he wil pack food for mi.. :) bt sad to sae.. he stil don really move my heart... bt hope time wil tel e.ting bah... as for now hope i can walk again lor.. is realy painful... haiz.. sian diao..................

sMaLL gAtheRiNg

2006-09-22T00:32:00.000+08:00

aFtEr wOrK wENt 2 mEet cLaSsmATe ( aNgeLiNg, XuE, waTi & tEcK) fOR dInnEr.. wE wEnt tO bEdOk 85.. wE oRdEr LotS oF fOoD.. gT bIg bIg OtaK, BBq chiCKen wIngs, bA ChoR mEe & STiNg RaY... e Food iS sO Yum yUm... aS wE eAT wE cHaT aLoNg e wAy... aLL e jokEs n UpdaTe sTuFf... haha.. tEcK sO pooR tIng.. kEna bULLy bY mE *& aNgeLiNe.. hE gAve uP iN e eNd.. LoL.. dEn hE wEnt oFf 2 mEet hIs fReN fOr mOvIe.. LeFt e 4 oF us.. cOnt oUr tOPic... dEn i & angeLinE sAe 4 gUts sIt neAr uS.. aLL qUITe bIuLt sIze... LoL... dEn gT one qUiTE cUte.. LoL.. WE keep LoOInG... e wOrSt iS tat tHey aRe GrEaT eAteR.... tHEy ATe dOnO hw mANy rOuNds SIa.. WesTeR fOOd, mEE, fIsh sOuP.. n COuNtLess tIme oF dRinKs.. Lol..
sAd tO saY, wE LeFt b4 thEm Lol... den wE wEn t To tAKe sOme pIcs.. eVen oNLy e 5 oF uS.. bT it wAs qUiTe fUn. lOl...

2006-09-21T13:12:00.000+08:00

Will You Be My Valentine?

Will you be my Valentine

Will you press your lips on mine

Will you say you love me so

Say you’ll never let me go

Will you hold me close to you

Tell me that your love is true

Can you feel my heart beat fast

I know our love is here to last

Look into my eyes and see

Just how much you mean to me

Promise me you’ll always be

Mine throughout eternity

I pray that you will answer yes

I love you that I must confess

iF i cAn cOnFeSs tO hIm hW mUch i Like hIm.. iT wiLl bE gReAt.. i aLso dOnO wAt i wAntEd.. qUite COnFusE... in mY hEaRt iS aLwAys Gw.. bt iT sEeM Like hE hAs gOnE wIt e wInD fOr 2yRs pLus... donO whErE is hE.. bEEn wAitIng fOr hIm.. til i mEt tAT gUy.. tAt gUy has eNtEr pArt oF mY Life.. eVen wE haD sHorT mEmorIes.. bT e mEmorIes LivEs iN mE LiAo.. iT wiLL nEv beEn oUt oF mY mY heAd.. (y? y? y?) reCentLY wE beeN cOntACtIng aGain LOr... @ e staRt i dOn feeL aNythIng.. i tHt e feeLiNgs haS lOng gOnE LiaO.. bT dEn nW dEn i onLy nOe iS nT Lor.. e fEeLing iS sTiL tHere... aCtuaLLy i haPpy tAt i caN sEe hIm wHen i wAn... eVen he hAs a Gf Liao... i dOn mInd Lor.. aNywAy wE alsO nT 2gaTheR.. bT i nOe is wiL bE hUrtFuL... & i rEaLy gT hUrt... sOmeTimes i wOndEr y dId We brEak iN e 1st pLaCe.. i stiL dOno e aNs.. n he neV wAn tO teL mI.. bT tIs mAy mI gO sIAo LOr.. LiKe mEntally tUoTurE bY hIm.. Lol... iT tAKes tIme fOr mI 2 LeT go n StanD uP aGaIn...

e WeRid tIng is hW cOme gW is gOiNg 2 bE repLaCe bY hIm... i cAnt fIgUre Out.. lOl... In mY hEart i oNLy LOvE 5 gUys e MOst... bt onLy 2 Live mi 4EvER.. (eDmUnd/tIanSonG/gUowEi/aNdRew/chrIs)(gW/ChrIs).... h...a....h....a....

2006-09-19T20:53:00.000+08:00

YeSt mOrn, ChrIs sEnd mI 2 hIs wOrk pLAce dEn fR tHER tOok bUs tO mY LaOpO hOme.. hMm dUrIng e jOurNey oF e sTuPuid jAm.. wE bOTh chaTtEd bT iS aLL tOkIng aBt e sTupId jAm.. wE sTuCk fOr 1hR 30 mIn.. sHld haVe tooK a bIt Of e jAM SIa.. haIZ..

aRRivEd @ LaOpO hOme aRd 10aM dEn sEE mY LittLe bF... hE iS dAme nOtti LOr.. bT cUte.. oh.. LOvE hIm... hMM sPent e whOLe dAy @ hER pLaCe.. dEn tAKe tUrN 2 LOok aFtEr e 2 kIDs.. dEn @ nITe wHEn 2 gReAt wOrLD wAIt for paxSOn fInIsh wORk.. dEn WEnt to kIm SEng pLaZa tO pLAy PooL... hMmm afTer taT wEnt hOme Lor.. sIan sIa.. hmmmm mAnage tO tAKe a rEst b4 gOiNg wOrk iN e mOrn...CoS @ nITe mArtIn cAMe To LoOk For tHeM.. haIz..

mO mOod wAs qUitE sTabLe LiaO.. AfTeR wAt haD haPpen iN e pAst wKs.. haIz. LeArn aLot of tInGs.. n haVe sUffer eNougH... dEcidEd to LEt gO of hIm LiAo.. sIncE he gT gF LiAO wAts e pT sIa.. aS LoNg hE is haPpy.. i aM haPpy LiAO... sOmeTuiMes itS gd tO sUPpoRt behind.. k.e.k.e.k.e

e WoRsT sIck i EvEr haD

2006-09-17T00:34:00.000+08:00

yEst i was dAme daMe sIck Lor... wOkE uP eArLy iN e mOrn pRePaRiNg tO gO wOrk dEn sUddenLy vOmItEd in e tOiLeT & aLsO aLittLe gIddy... dEn tInKiNg wAn gO wOrk aNt LOr.. caLL mY mANagEr hP neV oNz Leh.. sIan LoR..

dEn wEnt tO bUstOP LoR.. wOrSt Lor.. fEeL LiKe vOmItIng aGaIn.. LoL.. sMs mY maNaGer sAe i cAnt GO wOrk LOr.. dEn wEnT hOmE rEst.. wAs rEaLLy sOoo SIck tAT mY whoLe bOdy aChE... cOnT mY Zzzz tiL mY dAd gAve mI rIce wAtEr tO dRinK.. oNe mOutH dRanK aLL sIa.. eehHh sO hOrribLe... dEn wEnt bACk tO zZz...

haIz.. wHen i wAKe uP nObOdy @ hM Lor.. wAntEd 2 eAt sOmetHiNg bt nO sTrEngtH 2 cOOk... cRawL aLL e wAy tO e KitCheNn cOok mEe.. tHt i cAN eNjOy.. bt dEn eNd uP thRoW aWay e wHoLe bOwL cOs i cAnt eAt.. e mOmeNt i put iN my mOutH, i PuKe.. LoL.. haIz... wEnt baCK tO Zzzz aGaIn.. dEn aRd 3 pLus.. wOkE uP wIt hIgh FeVer.. 42dEgRess.. haha.. wAS sHiVeriNg Like heLL LaH..

dEn wHen 2 c dOc Lor... haIz.. gT AN injEctiOn.. so sIan sIa.. aCtuaLLY sCaRE paIn tIL gT nO sTrEngTh 2 TiNk of e pAin... wEnt hOmE Zzz aGaIn.. waS beTa tIs mOrn... caN jUmp, sHout, Run ... Lol...bt dOnO y tIs iS e 1sT tiMe i feeL liKe i gOiNg tO dIe LiKe taT.. dAme f sIck Lah.. wOndEr y mY fEvEr neV bUrn mY bRaIn.. so i can LosE aLL mEMOriEs.. LoL...

17/9> wEnt 2 ChuRch As usuaL... dEn eVening IvAn(didi) & saLLy cAMe tO mEET mI LOr.. 2gAThER wIT LiwEn tOo... wE wEnt cOffee-bEan @ taMP LOr.. sIt down n ChaT.. dEn Ard 11pLus wEnt hOme.. haIz.. aFter my baTh.. cHrIs caLL LOr.. wOw kAO mAde mI gO meeT hIM Lor.. i aLso dOnO y i gO meEt hIm.. lol..

rEaLLy dOnO y sIa....................LiFe sUcks!!!