i finally feel that when i am feeling down.. tats no one i can turn up to... mayb tats my fate n life bah... slowly i learn to accept that i shld cont to live in my own world and be left alone... i do not need any frens... any lover.. any help.. i feel like going back to my old footsteps.. mayb tat way i will be much happier and better... haiz... bt i will always be there for my frens when they need me...cos my heart for them is always pure. :)

my mood isnt stable any and i keep thinking abt e prob that i created... although nichlos and marcus ask mi to relax and stop thinking as the things have been done and i cant do anything. jus hope e.thing goes smoothly. wait till e result is out den decide... haha i cant believe they are e ones to be there for mi.... n i noe marcus will always do that.. he have been a listening ear for nearly 10yrs.. thanks dear.. i really touch...

my work was soo affected by my mood that i left work early yest to go home n rest... i jus feel like being alone... and i even give up working tdy cos i really low moral.. and wanted to find someone to tok.. bt den e.one seems to be busy here n there... suddenly i realise somethings.. friends are really company for fun and laughter.. when u really need them... no one is to be reach.. suai le... the title i already own -"Leave Me aLone" .. ..... .....

Exam are jus over.. haiz.. i am very disappointed wit myself. feeling like slapping n kicking myself.. i didnt do well for e last paper.. i read the question wrongly and wrote other things... y??? y??? wat happen to mi??? i burst into tears when i came out of e classroom... dono y cant hold back my tears.. i cant beleive e 1st person i call was nichlos to throw out my sorrow... he also gt a shock of his life...after some chat.. i cool down.. but den things didnt work well for long...

i didnt went out wit my classmates cos i was feeling super down.. don have the mood.. so i went home.. cope myself in my room the whole nite... n nw i cant sleep.. although is stil 3hrs to go b4 i go to work.. bt my mood is stil very upset...i dono y i screw up e paper.. is e last paper n is nt easy to score and i destory it... been crying e whole nite... haiz... zzzzzzzzz

tdy gt back e course work for most of e subj... hmmm was very satisfy wit some and disappointed in some too... bt overall was quite with some grades as my effort wont not paid off.. haha... den went home to rest...

well didnt really went out bt meet near my place... i cant believe my Vday was spent wit e young boy.. haha.. well.. he was soo cute and nice... he bake cookies and make a special drink for mi... tis is e hardship of his present he gave mi... haha... 1st time a guy cook something for mi.. lol... although he wasnt my bf... bt den he is gd catch.. haha.. u noe wat i mean??? hmmm den went home to rest.. wasnt feeling well e past few days..keke..

haiz... @ home resting suddenly i tht over alot of things... how come is nt him bt other ppl celebrating wit mi... did he went back to japan??? at least a sms or a email rite??? bt nth at all.. i stil rem last yr... he bought a ring n propose to mi... bt i sort of reject... due to some reasons.. bt nw nth is done.... am i going to wait??? is his promise being kept??? no idea... no ans... haiz... klah.. tired liao.. will update again...

yest went to daddy house.... had KFC for meals and enjoys e cocktails that he made for us... was enojoying his cocktail... and e fun with e rest... haha.. daddy also play facebook sia... and i keep perstering him to buy mi..lol.... went off quite early yo boon house for steamboat....

over @ boon house... as usual.. steamboat for dinner...and all e silly & funny lame jokes and chat... is been a long time we had a gathering... after which is majong session and e rest pokers.. as usual.. ahah.. with all e games n chat... till 12am haha.. den after is e most impt parts.. e photo session... we always come up wit lame ideas and taking pis nt stop.. haha

Yest, i dono y gt tis werid feeling asking mi to call him.... i dono whether he will be back fr japan bt jus feel he will... so i pick up e phone and call him... GUESS WHAT?? my feelings were rite... he is back in sg.. bt den no calls fr him.... so i tht of waiting a few more days to see he will contact mi??? Ans: NO.....

Sometimes i wonder whatever he say to mi isit true ant???? i really doubt guys words... haha... he say he promise to marry mi 2yrs time when he come back bt jus tis short trip.. he didnt even contact mi... gt a bad feeling something must have happen.... but watever itis... didnt affect mi much too... watever come to hand i just take it lor...keke....

@ last Projs and Reports are over... have been staying up sooo late.... and doing research like siao... @ last can take a gd rest... and enjoy my CNY which is next week.... bt den not looking forward @ all.. cos nth much to be happy abt.. e.year also e same... haha.... to be cont........