haiz.. school started a week... welll e timetable was ok ok only lah.. cos mostly in e afternoon... bt e subj boring n e lecturers also very de lame... nth interesting....although is e 1st week bt very slack lor... hmmm in bet have been working... so far stil can cope.. bt scare in e later part.. i will be slack n tired somehow...bt den things wont change.. stil have to work n cope wit sch... hopefully i am able to do it.. Rite juliet.. (u are a strong ger... )haha..e past week end met up wit joyce n chris.. n also wei lor.. well well.. he really melt my heart wit e things he did..

when i was sick.. he cook for me...
when i injure my leg... he took mi to doc..n apply med for mi..
lately he start singing bedtime song for mi...
n been waking mi up like crazy..(cos i refuse to wake up)
he is trying to spend his spare time wit mi.. haiz...
i dono wat to say bt felt touch lor..
is been a long time tat some did such thing for mi....
e other day when i met him.. i jus hug him n cry...
i also dono y... bt after crying i felt so relieve....
bt im sorry...i know u been reading my bog n left mess..
TO yOu: I'm really sorry... don wan to be a burden to u anymore.. i wan u to lead ur own life.. n carry on doing things.. u suppose to do... mayb my actions or words may mislead u & let u tink u have e chance.. bt as @ e moment.. i wan to settle my thngs n be free fr e..ting.. i don wan to waste ur time... is nt worth @ all.. bt i really appreaciate watever u done for mi... thanks i really touch... bt sometime.. somewhere.. if we have fate.. we be 2gather..lastly... i really touch n happy.. thanks alot... muacks.. haha.. take care n lead ur life.. kkk....

sian.. life havnt been too gd.. but den stil have to move onz... next week open sch liao... haiz... dono able to cont sch anot... waiting for reply to extend my payment for sch.... if they don approve den i have to quit bah... sian.... well well.. e.one has their own prob n ways to slove... bt it seems this time round i am lost.. complete lot..k lah.. gt to get some sleep..lately also stay up quite late...

been meetin joyce recently
she has married and tink she made e wrong choice
bt den she has no choice cos her hubby is gd
wat to do.. cos she accept his propose on impluse
haha... gt nth to say sia...
she has to chose bet freedom or wealth n status
nth is perfect... u cant have both...
so she lost her freedom... bt for wat i noe.. she is trying hard to be pleased
hope she can come up wit an ans.. or wat she really wan..
to divorce or cont tis road down..

as for mi... actually i didnt accept wei @ all.. bt den he has been nice to mi
he has been given mi moral support n by my side all tis while...
i dono wat to do... nw i am stil stuck in my prob....
thing don seems to work... wat have i done to deserve such treatment...
haiz.. tired of life...
tired of work bt stil have to hang on til i find a new one...
have been quite stress n stress in work... alot of things have change..
bt stil have to face it cos if i quit my job i wont have income...
no income means no sch. no home.. wat also don have...
have been praying soo hard.. asking how to slove e prob
y tis happen again n again... i really tired... really lost hope..
wat shld i do??????????????

yest have a good time after work... went dragonfly wit shi, ling, du jian &chris... wes dame f pack lah... bt slowly manage to find a spot @ e bar counter... haha.. as usual wit our drinks.. fun.. laughter... was quite happening... n we take turn to play 5-10.. haha.. @ 1st chris start to lose.. follow by me den du jian.. hmmm have all eentertainment.. left ard 5am.. share cab wit them.. den went to sleep.. as tml have to go church... really miss going club wit him.. haha.. haiz... tdy was too tired.. so slept nearly e whole day...

haiz.. tis few days hasnt been gd for mi lor... felt soo useless.. unable to find a job.. n have to worry soo many things... see my parents e.day fight over xxxxx and make himself soo stress... my savings also left nt much liao... mayb only able to cover til june..bt wt abt my expeness n sch... haiz... really felt very lost...n tis is e 1st time i felt so miserable... e other day i met up wit jin wei... actually we agree exchage something for something.. haha end up.. he sae i crazy n scolded mi like crazy.... n he transfer mi $$... he sae he is serious in looking after mi.. n wont leave mi alone.. haha... he wan to be my bf... siao... 1st he is 2 yrs younger den mi.. 2nd i nw have sooo much prob.. 3rd.. i feel like ending my life... 4th.. i dono how to carry onz.. or which way to move onz...

yest went to wing tai interview.. hopefully i get e job... bt til nw nobody call.. i jus need watever job to support tis family y cant i get it.... send sooom any emails none reply... interview soo many no repsond.. i even scarfise my sch time to go work.... y cant i jus get it..nev felt dame lost n ?????? .. tat day didnt went home so went to wei place... nearly kill myself bt stop by him... got scolded like hell lah... well well.. i really dono lah.. see wat GOD plan for mi... i jus hope my whole family will get thru tis time.... n i promise i will earn big $$ to let thme live comfortable.. as for now... see wat i can do...

anyway thanks jin wei... although i only noe u like 1 yrs plus.. bt u are there for mi when i really depress till no wher to go... all my frens dono gooo where...tat is y i believe... nev TRUST IN ANYONE ACCEPT URSELF... NO ONE WILL HELP U.... nt even UR FRENS... FRENS ARE ONLY FOR FUN & LAUGHTER.. when trouble comes.. ALL RUN AWAY.... hahahahahahahaha......................... crapps.

yEst had a great time with kor and his khakis... went to have our dinner @ cafe cartel.. they order those combo type.. n 3 diff type sia.. eat til e.one wan to vomit.. haha.. hmmm e food not bad.. have lots of jokes and dun during dinner...HAiz.. kOr paid For mI... aLtHOugH is bEen yeArs wE neV really contact bt is dao sao is de one who keep calling mi.. haha.. bt he treat mi not bad.. really look after mi... den after tat we planned to go drink de.. sO went to jimmy workplace @ clarke quay... but end up tooo pack for 10 of us... So end up went to MOS... was quite happening n pack like siao... den lao da open one btl... den i n christine quite enjoy de.. haiz den she suddenly mood swing n keep crying.. end up.. e.one have to leave cos of her.. hmmm a bit spoilt mood.. den end up went down to DRAGONFLY....

LefT> JiMmy & ChrIstinE

Right> mOi & ChrIstInE & dAo sAO

LeFT>QINg LoNg & mOi

RigHt> LaO dA & mOi

LefT> MoI & dAO sAO

RigHt> mOi & kOR kOR

yaP.. tOok cab down to Dragonfly... den meet up wit shi, ling and jie... den share table wit jie frens which is right in front of e stage... wooooo power sia... quite fun... actually i do enjoy bt is dame pack lah.. haha.. den play 5-10 den drink drink.. den noe tis "cute "guy.. haha took pic wit him.. ohh... den went home ard 5plus in e morn.. ohh.. was dame late lah.. went home.. dad awake liao.. haha... den faster bath n sleep.... Thanks t o my tis butch of frens... they help mi to release stress...

LefT> e CutE gUy & mOi... RigHt> mOi n GuItarEss Live bAnd


E fOuR oF uS aGaIn... Jie/LiNg/ShI & mOi

since i have not been working... i tink i have been going club.. last week.. almost e.day.. haha.. n i tink i fall sick fr there... n jus pass thur.. i again went wit my khaki... they are nw my latest club frens.. haha.. went down interview wit angeline den meet sharon @ orchard.. walk walk.. den went party world awhile with andy... haiz.. no voice stil wan to sing.. den break voice again lor.. haha... bt was quite fun lah... den meet up wit thomas.. wan n sharon frens... again to bb face... tis time round think drink e most sia.... we open 3btls.. cum e balance we have e other day... was quite happening... haha... n lots of craps.. joke.. fun & dance...

den i saw tis cute guy sitting beside our tbl... he gt style sia.. like tis type.. bt see only lah... den after time to go home... den saw him again. bt was dead drunk lah.. den his frens held up to the walk way... i dono wat i trying to do.. bt jus wan to help them make him awake... so i gave him a hot sweet.. n help him massage his neck so he sober a little.. den he keep saying pain pain.. ask mi to stop.. den i say... soon u be ok.. den he grab my hands.. n slowly his frens cant hold his weight.. so he lean on me.. haha.. ok lah.. nt trying to wat lah.. bt @ least i help someone to wake up... den his frens sae thanks to us.. den went home lor.. haha.. haiz.. den e next day super manage to wake up for church... dono y die die feel like going church esp is GOOD friday...

after which i went to work lor.. haiz. . jus noe e rest gt alot to tok... keep on asking how ta guy>?? haiz.. i jus ignore them.. haha.. den after work went to MR. Bean wit shi.. have some snacks n drinks.. den chat abt e past n present lor.. haha.. den went home Zzzzz. .. ok lah.. tink tis holiday i really do enjoy.... rather den work n work..haha... k lah.. going meet.. dao sao n e gang for dinner.. up date again..

well... lately mood nt really gd.... dono y... alot of things have happen.... jus cannot take it anymore...dono i can hold on how much longer... y y y y y things must always happen on mi... one after ant.... settle one thing come ant.. y cant i jus live a happy n simple life.. y must GOD take away e.thing from one jus over nite... wat have i done to deserve such treatment... anit im a gd person who risk my life.. my time.. my sleep.. my energy.. my love... my e.ting for ppl ard mi... (family... frens.. GOD...)den y do i deserve such treatment for nth... y must it be me??? i took alot of hardship... gone thru alot of stress... gone thru a painful life... gone thru e dark side of e world... for how long.. ever since i was young... over 20years.. isnt it enough for mi.... i work sooo hard.. all my effort.. doesnt pay off anythng good in return.... i don ans much.. to have watever i wan i will have bt jus a simple peaceful life..

and finally i get to noe a truth which i have wanted to noe for almost 2ys.. C current gf... is really e ger b4 mi... n i guess y we ended must be her... i don really feel sad bt super disppointed... y must he lie to mi... i used to like him soo much gave up soo many unhappy things n be gd to him n treat him soo gd... bt is tis e thing i gain in e end???? i long time doesnt have a gd r.s liao.... all come n go like freeflow.. haha... maybe tats really my life n fate bah... wat to do.... sometimes i even wish i am dead... bt y i cant??? my time is nt up??? i need to suffer how much longer???? am i born to have such life???? wat wrong have i done????

family.... frens.... love.... money.. sch.. job... life... haiz.............. gt nth much to say.... if tats my life to be.... i have to accept lor.... wat to do... tink i wish to have depression beta... so wat also no need to be trouble.. e.day being crazy is e best... hahahahahahaha......................................................... thanks really thanks.. i must apperciate e life i have...........

didnt really work much tis week.. was quite quiet... so keep going drink n meet up wit some old frens... haiz.. seeing one by one getting beta... well.. well... hmmm sat after work meet up with chew yan.. went MS shop shop & as usual went for drinks n chat abt e past.. haha.. it was sooo fun when we recall and after tat went shop shop alone b4 meeting up wit e rest for club...

spending tis time alone.. i see sooo many ppl walk up n down.. the things they did.. i felt like is really short... nw watever things u are doing u must enjoy.. time pass very fast... n theres no turing back.... so enjoy urself while you can... 9plus met up wit andy, thomas and sharon... den went down BB face.. level 3... starting was a bit boring.. bt later onz... was quite fun... took some pic... drink like siao.. haha.. really enjoy clubbing wit them.. as they are dame joker n funny.. haha... thanks guys.

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